Year 3, October 6th-8th, 2018: Weekend Taxi Drivers

Well, now, actually, guess who was the busiest taxi driver this weekend?  Grandma Leah!  Yup! Not only did she have to wait for Benaiah to help close CFA much later than normal on Friday night, but she also had multiple stops on Saturday.  First of all, CFA closes at 10:30.  But 3 school buses full of people, and another rush of 30-40 people kept them busy until 10:45.  They had to lock the doors behind the guests, but they were still taking orders at 10:45.  They even had to turn some fryers back on to accommodate everything!  Benaiah did not clock out until 11:41pm and he had started work at 2pm.  Grandma had given him a ride to work as well.  That's when the other kids and I were trying to run errands.  Gary and Jared were gone for an e2 event in Georgia.  Then on Saturday, I went with Justin to his first Bible Bowl competition of the season.  That meant that Leah had the other two kids from 8 until 3:30pm, except she had a wedding shower at church to attend from 11a-1p and also had to get Benaiah to work by 2p.  She dropped the kids off at a friends house before the wedding shower and then picked them up after she dropped off Benaiah.  Oh, and she had a campfire/hayride thing with their small group that evening.  And THEN she had to go back out and pick up the men at 10pm, swing by CFA at 10:30 to collect Benaiah from work, and THEN finally make it back home.

And of course, we all had to get up early for church today and keep running until we got home at 8pm.  We went early because Keturah's friend Bailey was baptized during first service by none other than Leah and another small group leader in KP!  Keturah ended up going back to Bailey's house to celebrate while the rest of us volunteered/attended church service as normal.  We reconvened for lunch, with an extra kid in tow, Justin's friend Bryce.  Meanwhile, Benaiah actually skipped out on our church (the first time in his entire life) to study for his English course and mow Grandpa's lawn.  He played drums in the evening at his prinicpal's church, so he still got to go to church.  That might shock some, but a) he still went to church and b) I refuse to be legalistic about it because I am/was a legalist and that kind of thinking has gotten me into big trouble and is part of my current struggle.  Benaiah is exhausted, and he did need the extra sleep and time to work at home.  Now, if he asks for it again, we will say no.  And I know just attending youth group or small group or leadership class or Jared's Bible class doesn't make up for actually knowing God and being with His church in a traditional church service, but on some level, it all counts.  Church isn't about what service you attend or what they do in that service.  Church is a community of believers.  And that's what his trip to NYC next week is all about.  Church doesn't have to be done a certain way to "count." And he asked us, he didn't tell us, he didn't insist on it, but he asked.  I'm not sure how his actual walk with God is or if he's reading his Bible and praying (which can also be done legalistically), but that's not up to us.  So, I was fine with it, Jared preferred he didn't, but didn't want to die on that hill, sort of speak, either.  But some might, so that's why I'm explaining it.  Or maybe because I'm trying to convince myself that it's really ok (see, it's the legalist in me!)

After lunch, we rested and then Jared drove Keturah and I to church for volunteering, and took Benaiah to Mr. Nanney's church.  Then he came back with Justin and Abishai so Justin could go to small group.  Bryce had been picked up earlier.  I started having another bloody nose as I walked into church, and it took awhile to stop that before I could pick up a baby to rock her.  But she was new, only 4 months old, and wouldn't settle so I had to call the parents.  I reassured the parents to keep bringing her in and we'll keep trying but because she's so young, I didn't want to keep her crying for very long.  I then helped over in the walkers/2's room, which was not something I do very often.  I enjoyed it though and saw one of my little guys I babysit on Wednesday nights.  There was a clingy little girl, but that's ok.  Keturah went to choir and came back utterly exhausted.  Justin had a grand time in small group as usual.  Abishai got to eat his dinner of oatmeal and mango from Daddy's food stash (and whatever else was in his diaper bag) at Daddy's desk watching muddy trucks and other videos.  I tried to read for a bit but was so tired I was falling asleep.

I'm working on getting to bed by 12am and have made it twice this week so far.  Not sure if I'll make it tonight or not.  I did wake up at 6:30 and had a hard time falling back asleep though.  My body is not used to more than 6 hrs of sleep.  I'm also going to try half dose of zoloft.  I've been off of it for 1 year and have come to some conclusions.  First, it isn't affecting my weight loss or gain as first suspected.  Second, I've been more moody, angry, anxious, etc. on any given day of the month, not just at PMS time, than I've ever been.  And now that I've identified and "lived with" these emotions and issues for a year, I have a better understanding my current baseline and can work through those things with my new counselor.  But it's been very, very rough for Jared and the kids to deal with the angry/anxious side of me.  They never know when I'll be set off by something.  It's not fair to ruin their childhoods with a mom like this.  So, I'm taking it slow and just adding the half dose to my routine.  I didn't have any issues going on or off it before, but I'm still keeping an eye on things because our friends' 16 year old committed suicide because he had just recently switched the antidepressant he was on.  There's a syndrome that sometimes happen when you start taking an antidepressant where you all of a sudden feel great and brave enough to do things you were hesitant to do before.  And that's probably why this kid probably did what he did.  The parents were aware of this side effect and were watching for it, but still didn't catch it in time.  They did nothing wrong.  But they, and I, want to keep sharing that this side effect is real and to watch out for it.  So, I'm alerting people to keep an eye on me just in case, although I've never had that syndrome when I went on it before and don't suspect I'll get it now.  Zoloft is the cheapest, "safest" anti depressant on the market anyway, and I take a really low dose at 50 mg (full strength, I'm starting out with 25mg) per day.  And no, I'm not afraid to share this because I believe that some Christian moms are ashamed and won't admit that they need help.  It's not a sin to take antidepressants (and some work as anti anixiety like in my particular case where I have more anxiety than I do depression).  It's not a sin to see a counselor.  It is a sin to keep yelling at your children for being children.  It is a sin to get so upset over such a mundane thing on social media.  It is a sin for almost ruining vacation because you get too anxious and bossy.  God works with and through medication, counseling, and other helps.  There is zero shame in any of that.  I went off of the Zoloft to confirm or disprove it's affect on my weight and to find out how I really feel and what I really think, not because I was ashamed of being on it.  And that's my two cents on the matter.

And to cap off the day, Benaiah walks in the door and declares, "The McCollum (kids) are insane!"  Apparently, they made up some weird thing about a torso with no arms and legs and certain body parts for eyes and mouth etc.  The McMollum's brought him home after the service at his prinicpal's church.  These kids are so ridiculously insane, hilarious, weird, fun, crazy, and so tired that they are talking gibberish, but we love them to pieces anyway.  And Benaiah NEEDED this kind of banter so badly today, I'm sure.  With not having a great grade in his English class (for many reasons, one not being lack of effort) to working 30 hrs a week to taking care of his friends' drama, he just needed to let loose and I'm glad he has friends he can do that with.  I'm sure they will now have that as an inside joke at school and the other kids won't have a clue what they are talking about.  Fun times in high school, as it should be!  Love it!  Just like the middle school kids throwing cheeseballs at another kid with a dog "cone of shame" thing on where they were supposed to catch the cheeseballs.  Just like the high schoolers tonight playing an interactive game of rock, paper, scissors and using an exercise floor hoop thingy or something.  What goofballs they all are!

I almost forgot the awkward goofiness at Bible Bowl yesterday with kids who won't let a joke go and gibberish between siblings. It was a super tough competition and our kids have to remember that they were playing against the current reigning national champions.  Our round robin is the toughest in the nation, so if you do well here, nationals is a piece of cake.  The kids did win 2 out of 10 rounds though.  And Justin made his personal best on the written test.  Of the 127 questions he did answer, he got 107 right.  Unfortunately, there's 150 questions to answer in just 30 minutes.  That means 12 seconds per question.  The top 20 kids had 149 and 150 questions correct and had to take tie breaker questions in order to figure out their ranking.  Justin has a goal for next time of getting 115 questions right.  He also has the goal of beating everyone at small group at a Fortnite dancing competition during their Fortnite Nerf Wars battle in a couple of weeks.  The kids are dressing up in costume, too.  So, he was practicing his dance moves tonight because he realized that during small group at church tonight, the kids were laughing at him and not with him when he was dancing.  Aw, poor guy!  He's in it to win it, though! He doesn't start out to be competitive, but he has the initiative to try and be a better version of himself.  He's ok when he loses and rationalizes his losses, just like I do.  Either way he's having fun and doesn't seem too stressed about it.  He's just a goofy, awkward 13 yr old as he should be.

As I mentioned, Keturah was exhausted from the weekend (including leading worship in KP) and so was Abishai.  He slept for 2 hrs this afternoon and then had a hard time falling asleep tonight.  He went right past me and gave Bryce, who was behind me, a big hug when he saw him.  He loved his Sunday School class again and can articulate the 3 men in the fiery furnace story. He showed us all his dance moves from the songs they sang, and then talked about getting the bad guys.  We are ready to stay home and have a restful Monday, sort of.  I have two appointments again, one for my PCP and one for counseling, and the man and man child have work and school, plus homeschool for the middles.  But that's all normal.  Life marches on.

Trying to sneak a picture at Bible Bowl.  I decided not to bring any reading or crosstitch this time, so in order to stay awake, I used an app someone created to keep scores at Bible Bowl tournaments.  I don't think it's an official app because it's too basic, but it kept me engaged.  Justin doesn't a chance to say anything when he's on the Division 1 team because everyone else is so much faster.  Remember, these guys are the best in the nation.  But, he was there and he loved being part of the team anyway.

Yup. It should cool down by Thursday, but really?

For the past few years, at the end of the day at nationals, there's an invidiual tournament where players play against each other instead of as a team, so it's teammate against teammate.  It's based on categories and point values like Jeopardy.  First one to 50 points wins! And one of our guys, Daniel, was 2nd in our room!  12 rooms, so 12 winners.  No extra trophies and I don't know if they officially record it yet because everyone's still getting used to the idea, but it went by quickly and seemed like a lot of fun!

Yes, I tried to go into the store so I could see/say hi to Benaiah 3 separate times this week and every time the store was super busy.  That's a good/bad thing.  But my wallet and tummy say no more pop!  Sugar=calories I don't need and sweeteners=bloated belly and stomachache.  But they have Cherry Coke AND diet Dr. Pepper! Sigh.  Back to cooler temps and low cal coffee with no sweeteners or sugar but just as yummy at home (or tea if the stomach isn't handling coffee that day either.  Yes, pity me, stomach issues are a brutal burden, let me tell ya.  Joking, but not really.)

Nice clouds!

It took us three nights, but we watched "The Last Jedi" and just started "Avengers: Infinity War" tonight.  We had also gotten "Star Wars: Rogue One" last week.  Boy these 2 1/2 hr movies take forever to get through when you're busy and kids can only stay up so late!  Yeah for library movies!  And, I haven't told Jared yet, but I think I want to keep this chair.  For me, it's super comfy and Abishai loves it.

Awww, pitiful old dog.

We were waiting on Daddy to answer the phone, but he had to shut off his phone for the plane to take off.  He had just sent us this.  Little guy really misses his Daddy when he's away!  He kept pointing to Jared's old license "I miss Daddy!"

Reading books TO Mommy!

"Mommy, turn the camera around so I can show you!"

Home again, home again, jiggity jig.  This next week they will drive to Missouri and back for another e2 event.

Decent foliage app, but it's based on people reporting in what colors they have.  Some places have no reports.  I'm just hoping the color in southern Indiana waits for October 26th where we've blocked out a day to go hiking just the 6 of us.  Both Jared and Benaiah are taking time off.  I'm actually kind of surprised that they didn't make a stink about it.  I think Jared remembers how much fun the two of us had last year when we went away for the weekend and hiked.  Even if it's drizzly, we will still go, because asking for time off for Benaiah is near to impossible.  This is a picture of Wisconsin because I was talking to someone on Instagram about what their leaf colors were like up there.

Sleeping like an angel.  He fell asleep so quickly the last two nights because of our super busy days.  Jared says we should probably start transitioning him to starting out in his own bed at night because he's been waking up when Jared transfers him from our bed to his bed.  But he's our baby!  He can't grow up!  We never did this with the others (where have you heard that before?)  And we don't apologize for babying him because well, that's what makes the baby, the baby!  So sweet!

Somebody bought himself a fortnite (video game) mask for a costume party/nerf war/dance off party at church in a couple of weeks.  $20 for that one mask and it smells like spray paint.  I had to leave outside overnight because it was giving us a headache.  I hope it's worth it!

Personal best!  Yeah! 107 out of 127 correct!

Nice job!

These are amazing!  And addicting!

They don't guarantee they are gluten free because they were made on shared equipment, but they don't have any gluten containing ingredients on purpose.  And they use real pumpkin, real sugar (not corn syrup), real cinnamon (instead of all those "natural flavors."  Oh Aldis, I love you for your commitment to (relatively) healthier foods!

Yup, it's that time of year again.  Picture from 1991/1992.

Screenshot from their Instagram feed, but it's Hillsong NYC you guys!  And they won't be at that theater next week (same theater that For King and Country played at last week), but their regular place.  So jealous of Benaiah right now!

Rare moment here!  The preacher is watching and the preacher's wife is in the dunk tank! Keturah's friend, Bailey, was baptized today and she asked for Leah and her 3rd grade small group leader to do it!  How sweet is that!  And what a rare treat for Leah, who prefers staying in the background.  Awesome!

"This is how a baby climbs the stairs, Dad."  Perfect place for the stairs that they use on the sides of the stage sometimes.  It works well when a whole class from KP comes down to watch their fellow classmate get baptized.

Keturah and Bailey.  It was Bailey's real birthday, too!  And now she has two birthdays!  Keturah sat with Grandma and Grandpa for the whole first service so she could be there for it.

Bailey's first time taking communion.  Keturah has been to the baptism class but hasn't indicated much interest in going further with it.  We aren't pushing for it either.  I was baptized at age 12 and Jared was much earlier at age 7 I think.  Benaiah and Justin were both 7.  But lots of teens come to Christ, too, (especially after CIY, remember there was like 40 baptisms from that alone!).  So we keep praying but no pushing.  We're hoping that Bailey's baptism does spark something in Keturah though.

When you are busy the rest of the week and just need a break, you skip church in order to catch up on sleep, school, and mowing so your phone bill is paid for.

Uh, I think Mommy ordered too much Paw Patrol from the library this week!

Ah! It feels like my whole life is exposed to the whole wide world!  Mr. Dan and Mrs. Mary are back! And using some of the insurance money to weatherproof the shed.  And just in the nick of time because there are fresh termite tunnels in the foundation!  And Dan said there was a ton of wasps in the eaves.  Ugh!  This is why I'm so nervous to put stuff out here where I can keep an eye out on it.  It's a humongous shed though and stores a ton.  But only plastic, or plastic wrapped, or items I'm ok with getting destroyed (like kid school papers, which, I'm not really ok with, but know that eventually throw most of it out and just need a sampling of it for posterity which usually can be easily salvaged if something happens to it).  Not sure on that mattress up there.  And I just put the family heirloom bassinet out there!  Wrapped in plastic, but still.  Sigh.  When Dan is done, I'll go inspect everything again.  He'll treat the termites himself though and has done that with his rental properties in Florida.  I certainly wasn't expecting this project this week, but ok fine.  Dan will also make custom doors so we can finally secure the shed.  We've had no lock on it for the past 18 months but no one seems to want to steal anything, for which I'm glad.

Abishai and Socks were both out there a good amount today "supervising" despite the heat.  Abishai listened well when we told him to keep his boots on so he doesn't step on a nail.  He asked me for my gardening gloves so he can move wood that is 1.5 times his size! And he asked Mrs. Mary to push him on the swing, too.  He loves to be outside and he loves to be helping!

The irises bloomed!  How pretty!  Leah said that maybe these have been bred to bloom late.  But we did have a few days of cold and then a big warm up, so I think they are confused.  Oh well, they are pretty!

Mommy, the peas are boulders! My truck can't get through!  (I think he's been watching too much "Dirty Trucks" which is a show about jeeps and trucks off roading in extreme conditions).  And yes, I let him because why not?

Fish are friends, not food!