Year 4, September 20th-22nd, 2019: Finally, It's the Weekend!

It's been a LONGGGG week!!! On Friday, we had to stay home from park day because I was supposed to get a phone call from the taxpayer advocacy service downtown but of course, no one ever called.  Grrr....but we did end up getting everything wrapped up for school this week!  Usually we have some assignments to finish up on Saturday. Plus, the house was picked up and everything was up to date.  Now I just have to read ahead for next week. I understood Justin's reading so far, but now we are starting Dante's "The Divine Comedy" (Longfellow's translation/version), and it has lots of notes but oh boy, it's definitely not something easy for me to understand, never mind Justin.  We'll see how it goes for a bit.  Just because a book is included in a curriculum (it's a big chunk of the literature part of it) doesn't mean we have to do it.  I might have to switch to something else.  But it's also just been a long week with getting on each other's nerves, so two days ago, I told my favorite ladies that I'm definitely coming to Mom's Night Out tonight.  We just go out to eat and talk, and it's usually the same crowd, so although I don't get to go every time, I still feel pretty comfortable with them.  3 of the moms tonight do the park days regularly with us.  In fact, Molly, mom of Esther, Eli, and Lilly, said her kids were so excited when Abishai got on Fortnite with them.  They had played online together this afternoon!  We don't do other activities with them and we don't go to the same church, but they have a great time together.

And we were going to a restaurant I knew had great gluten free options and wasn't badly priced, McAlister's Deli. Not fast food, but service similar to CFA where they can bring you your food and refill your drinks if they aren't busy.  We talked and talked about all kinds of things, included our hormones and kids dating/going off to college.  And it was good to hear that I'm not alone in that we struggle in our relationships with our kids sometimes. Actually, some of the teen girls came too, but they set separately from us so we could talk about them, lol. It was just what I needed and the food was delicious!  I did make sure we had leftovers and I made a nice salad for Jared for dinner.  Benaiah went out with Ava for dinner/go shoe shopping and then came back to the house until curfew.  He had originally been scheduled to work, but found someone to trade shifts with.  It's his only free night for date night.  I got home around 10 and Keturah was still awake, too!  Whoops! Bedtime for the middles so I can have a different kind of downtime.  Thanks!

I had used the Clicklist service at Kroger to try to reserve this pumpkin so that we can complete the set Benaiah bought us, but when they went to pick out the item before I picked it up, it had been sold.  I tried other Krogers and even called one, but no luck.  I put out an SOS on Facebook on my personal page and in a general local group and my friend Ali saw my post.  Well, she went into a Kroger on the westside of Indy and found one!  She bought it for me right then and there, and I'll pay her back of course.  Phew!  She's such a sweet woman, a sweet Kindergarten teacher, a sweet volunteer in the nursery.  She's always thinking of others, too.  Oh how we love her and we try to do things for her, too! I'm just glad she located one.  I was getting pretty frustrated at myself for waiting so long to look for it.  Yeah!  I ended up canceling the clicklist order over the phone, thank goodness.  The MM's were just a little add on to the order I saw, so I didn't really need them.  So, my first experience with Clicklist (which has a $5 service fee), was ok.  Basically, with Clicklist, you order online and then the employees get the items for you and bag them up.  Then you pick the groceries up at the pick up door at the side of the building.  It's supposed to save you time.  But you still have to drive to the store, too. I like looking at everything and sometimes I get inspired when I'm at the store.  So, I probably won't use the service again.

 I love listening to Abishai's stories when he plays.  It gives me a little insight into what his brain is thinking.

I did take Abishai outside for a bit so he could do probably one last swim in the pool.  He decided to jump on the trampoline with his wet bathing suit on and slip on it on purpose as he ran his normal laps around the edge of the trampoline. Goofball.  The swimming pool should come down soon.  We definitely learned some things this year with it.  First of all, the water did stay "clean" with the bleach tablets and a cover. Second, the tannins in the unfiltered water settle to the bottom but get mixed up again as they swim, so the water still looks "dirty."  Third, we should have inflated the upper ring a bit more by now because I feel like it's caved in a bit.  Fourth, thankfully we used the same water all summer, and only had to add some more water a couple of times.  That's a lot less maintenance than our pools of the best where I do to clean and refill them weekly. The improvements we could make for next year is to start with filtered water. I don't know if we can somehow hook up the hose to a faucet downstream from our water softener and filter or not, but to me, it's worth a try.  I really wish we could afford the even bigger ones with a regular frame, but you can still take it down every year.  Only Abishai gets in the small pool and it's almost not worth it for just one kid.  I know we were gone and I was sick/busy a lot so that's why I didn't get Abishai outside as often as I hoped. So, I'm hoping when we take it down, we'll be able to salvage it and use it again next year.  Let's do it!

Duckie and pool time.

Mom, I need my diving gear!

Ready for some snorkeling!

Crashing in!

Less than $13 for black cherry lemonade (my sweet treat for the evening), a small cup of vegetarian chili and half of a turkey club with orange cranberry sauce on gluten free bread.  It was their 2 for a certain price thing. Perfect amount of food for me.

Saturday was a lazy one.  Jared had some things to do on the computer so he didn't get into any outdoor projects.  It was way too hot anyway.  I need to make a short list of some projects he can do that don't take long for days like this. My agenda was to get some reading done, take a shower (it doesn't happen every day, I'm a mom), do Justin's science experiment with him, and rest.  Well, we got it all done and then some!  We also went to the park after supper because Abishai requested it. Jared and I had a very long nap together, too.  Which meant, Justin and Abishai stayed on longer than they should have on their electronics.  Whoops.  Keturah got a little bit of time before supper.  We stayed at the park about 45 minutes because only Justin brought water and it was still pretty hot.  Jared chased after Abishai while I got to finally explore the whole paved walkway around the edge of the park.  And there I discovered a huge stream! I'm pretty sure it's on someone else's property because of some fencing, including some barbed wire pretty close to the ground. But it was a pretty spot to look at. So, the kids were whiny and Keturah was unhappy that she was told she had to go to the park, so I took away the rest of her screen time when she snapped at us.  She was even short with a neighbor of ours who happened to be at the playground for about 15 minutes when we were there.

But all in all, it was a pretty relaxing day, with no pressure, just what the doctor ordered. Well, just what we needed that's for sure.  Meanwhile, it's been 3 1/2 weeks since my melanoma removal surgery and it's 2 1/2 weeks until my polyp removal surgery.  Having minor sugeries 6 weeks apart is a lot on me emotionally and mentally, but it's going to be a lot financially, too, unless I can get some financial hardship aid directly from the providers. For example, only half of my melanoma surgery was covered, so it's going to be $1,000 or more before all is said and done.  I don't know about my polyp surgery yet.  Anything I have done through our pcp office, which includes the obgyn area of the clinic, is already discounted because we've already given them the financial info and the discount lasts for a year. But Jared's CT scan and allergy testing is going to cost a pretty penny as well. And our HSA won't be enough to cover it. That's why getting our tax refund from February is crucial.  We've been pretty tight and have gone without things like a/c in the van because of not having it. It's quite a "hardship" as the taxpayer advocacy calls it.  I hope I can get a hold of them next week!  Or I'm going to have to try and go to their office downtown, which I don't know if I'll have access to or not.  Sigh. I can't wait to get passed all this.

Cute picture from 9 years ago, so Keturah was 14 months old.  Wish I could fit in that shirt again.  And look how short my hair was! And there's a 5 yr old Justin in the background.

My brother, Paul-Mikael on the left, got to have fun with a friend this weekend for once! When you've had a rough life like PM has, it's awesome to finally have some fun!  They went to a Cincinnati Reds game.  Not sure who PM's friend is though.  And I keep forgetting that PM has gained a ton of weight.  He doesn't quite look like the skinny brother I had, lol.

Abishai found a water color paint set with some papers nearby and asked to paint, so we let him paint!  Sweet!  He painted with his left and his right hand.

This would have not made sense to me 24 hrs ago, but I watched a video about being a VSCO girl/guy just last night, so this totally makes sense.  Apparently it's a trend where they have a hydroflask, wear srunchies, and say sksksksksk all the time.  They wear big baggie t-shirts and crocc. More natural make up and hair in a ponytail. It's just one of those cultural things that are in vogue for a little while and then they aren't.  But why on earth does Benaiah know about this?! Again, it was just a video a channel I watch put out, I wasn't seeking it out and I had no idea what it was.  But yes, these are Benaiah's scrunchies and his brand new hydroflask.  Quite interesting.

"These are my army guys all lined up, pew, pew, pew!"  You know you have boys in the house when they turn everything into war and violence?

Speaking of violence, we got to watch a violent reaction with this experiement today.  You add yeast to hydrogen peroxide to form oxygen bubbles and then you catch them in  balloon.

Then you light a candle, put it under a jar leaving just enough room to put the balloon under it and then slowly release the oxygen inside the balloon.  That way, when the oxygen in the jar is used up, it can use the oxygen in the balloon and still glow.  And without oxygen, the flame goes out.  The experiment went flawlessly and I'm glad Jared was around to help.

Since Justin jumped up on the climbing pyramid, Jared did, too.  He got up to the top really fast! And almost lost one of thse shoes.  Whoops!  I was actually surprised Jared said we could all go to the park because nose had started exploding with snot again.  I'm so glad we made the effort.  It was a bit warm, but overall, not too bad.  There's no bathrooms or water at this park, which annoys me a ton, but what can you do.  That's one reason why I was investigating the woods along the path.  The path is invisible from the playground so I think it would be ok to go the bathroom in the woods in an emergency.

Round and round they go.  And they both stayed up a very long time!

Abishai tried to climb this one, but didn't quite make it.  Keturah got to the top though.

Mr. Nolan, our neighbor, in the background.  Abishai wanted to play follow the leadaer but with him as the leader.  Nolan wasn't buying it, so Abishai said to go away.  Whoops, we shouldn't say that.

Through a break in the wood next to an old fence line (including barbed wire almost hidden by the ground, a large stream flows.  I might come back in a few weeks to observe the fall foliage.  How beautiful!  I didn't venture down at all because I suspect this is private property, although there was no sign on the fence. 

Justin decided to climb all kinds of things with his long, monkeyish, bare toes.  And that's our neighbor Kendall in the swing beneath him.

Long skinny feet!

Are you comfy up there?

Brave boy!

"I could lap up here and get a tan!" he said.

Justin and Kendall twirling in the twisty seats.

Abihai and Nolan with Jared in a bigger spinner seat thing.

Caught you on camera climbing! Lol.  She just couldn't resist, although she didn't want to be there in the first place.

Finally, taking a walk together!  This path encircles the park. Also, note that Jared was riding the scooter? Lol!

Loads of noises, but I bet its from a huge population of cicada in there.

"Daddy, I made a key!"  Now, what are you going to see your key for?  Earlier, Abishai had put a blue Lego plate under the bridge so that they would have to go something.

3 and 1/2 weeks post surgery.  I had just taken a shower, so the area is a bit redder than normal.  I can't wait to see just how long it takes for the holes for where the stitches were will heal up.  I keep gently massaging it so dissolve the inside stitches and put things back in place.

Sunday, well, Abishai decided to get up in the middle of the night AGAIN because he's afraid of things falling between his mattress and his bedframe.  Ok, this has to stop.  We can't sleep when he sleeps with us. He's cute and all, but good grief, sleep in your own bed. So, it was a slow groggy morning.  Thank goodness I had had a shower the night before after the playground, so I could keep things slow and put together a cute outfit without rushing.  I found some fallish shoes on clearance at Meijer for $9 each, one a size 6 1/2 in "camel" and one in size 6 in grey.  So I'm trying to find ways to use them. Today I went for a feminine look with a knit dress with some lace detail.  I think one of those wide brimmed hats would have sealed the deal IF I looked good in one of them.  Oh well. I used a my brown Lilla Rose headband instead. I had pulled my hair back into a braid before bed last night hoping to get some curls, but the braid looked decent enough with the headband and overall look, so I left it like it was.

Today's outfit.

Anyway, church was great!  Songs were good, I stayed awake, I wasn't freezing despite wearing a knee length dress, and boy, the added physical elements on stage were on point!  Oh how I've missed those!  We did away with our monologues and skits years ago, and we haven't had any physical set pieces in years either because they were trying to cut down on the creative arts budget for those things so they could update equipment like get those laser lights and fog machines. But I've really messed them!  Just using a tv screen to share the points of the sermon and the Scripture associated with it can get a bit boring.  I think they (I would say we, but we were gone for some of it) got pretty stagnant in their services, and I'm enjoying seeing them try out new things again like order of service.  I can't wait to see how things change when we hire a new worship minister! We knew things were going to change after the transition and boy have they! I find it very exciting, although I'm sure some of the older folks are cringing.

Hm,....can you guess what we are talking about today?

How about now? Hint: We are in the book of Exodus.

And what about now? The end of the book of Mathew.

I loved how Dan literally painted the "blood" on the door frame and the cross and related the two stories together in a slightly different way than I've heard before.  He included facts like how the Israelites were doing this on the first day of the first month of THEIR calendar, which they hadn't been able to use while on the Egyptian calendar.  He relayed that the script writers of the Prince of Egypt were told by rabbis they were consulting with that it HAD to be blood on the door frame.  He also sat on one end of the table in the Exodus story and the other end of the table in the last Passover story.  When he painted the blood on the cross, he mentioned every body part that the blood would have come from.  It was incredibly poignant. Oh how I've missed these visuals!

Today was also mission Sunday where the Go! ministry sets up booths and stations to share what we do on a global scale.  I didn't take any pictures but they showed ministry partners, statistics on Thanksgiving baskets and food pantry and Generous Bucket ministry happenings, unreached people groups, packing snacks to share with local hard working teachers, etc. We walked quickly through it with Keturah and Abishai.  Keturah did not like it because she wanted to play video games in between services.  Abishai didn't understand most of it.  But there were these bingo cards that had different things on them to cross off if you've done them, and some of them were like "go to camp (CIY)" and "donate to Thanksgiving baskets."  We have done a lot of them!  Yeah! That made me feel like a good parent that we've made our children aware and they have seen Jared, Gary, and Leah all go on mission trips.  So of course something like this would be boring to them.  But imagine all those church goers who don't have a clue or weren't raised in church or in a minister's family.  These kinds of things are for them. Anyway, it looked pretty neat as always.

Pretty cool that we already do a lot of this!  There's so much you can do from the comfort of your home!  Somebody has to be the sender of missionaries, right?

We had lunch with Leah, as Gary had been in Texas and then flew directly to Kansas doing his thing. We swapped Justin for Emily so both Keturah and Justin had individual friend time.  I listened as Emily was telling a former teacher she saw at church how kids are mean to her at school (she's in 6th grade in the local middle school and her grade school friends go to the other middle school).  She wishes she was homeschooled but understands that her mom and dad both work so she can have things like voice lessons. This is the loud Emily I've talked about in the past.  But when you separate Eliot and Emily, they are much calmer and sweeter. I felt bad though, that so far, her 6th grade year is hard.  The teacher also said that her daughter's 6th grade year was tough too.  I'm beginning to really like these new friends of the kids.

Abishai played cards with the girls and actually really tried to follow the rules.  They were very kind to him.  He looks so big here, too!

Jared used Abishai as a human bowling ball when Abishai was playing bowling with Grandma.  Abishai loved it!

Eventually, we all ended up back at church at various times for various things.  It was just Abishai and I at home for about 90 minutes, so I got ahead on reading for the week.  Then I took him to Jared at church without shoes on dragging his toddler quilt sized Thomas blanket with him, just because he could.  I carried him into church and he walked around with a blanket and no shoes.  Yup, I'm that mom.  I thought it was cute and freeing and who wants to argue? Lol.  Then Jared took him home, the other 3 stayed at church, and I met up with homeschool friends at Kroger cafe' again.  I had stuck around for a bit at church waiting for a friend to show up with her boys, but then I was late for the homeschool meeting too.  Unfortunately, my friend's boys are very shy and the one that is Justin's age, was very, very overwhelmed and doesn't want to ever go back.  So, I told her that we can get the boys together one on one since they have decided to homeschool again.  Jesse and Justin are just a couple months apart in age and were in MOPS together when they were infants. Justin has such a big heart, that I'm hoping that he can reach Jesse in some way and bring him out of his shell.  We'll see.  Jett, the older one, is a year younger than Benaiah and was a bit overwhelmed, but also interested in going back.  I know it's hard to walk into a situation like that and I pray we can help them in some way because they have helped us so much over the years.

Benaiah actually stepped up to the plate and said that he didn't see anyone at this sign in station, so he claimed it and welcomed people in.  They have lots of signs and teens at the door greeting people as they come in.  And they sign in just so that there's some kind of attendance and the leaders can follow up with people that haven't been there for awhile.  Benaiah even did a little dance to the songs they were playing.  Of course Ava and Ethan were also close at hand.  And look closely at their feet.  Why yes, Benaiah and Ava did buy matching slide sandals on Friday night AND they both wore long black socks today.  I bet they totally planned it, too! So sappy!

I went to my meeting and then went back to church to pick up the middles because Benaiah had only his truck.  It would make more sense for him to help transport them but at the same time, then I would still have to do it when he went off to college or something. Once the roundabout near us is open, it won't seem like such a burden.  There was more paving done on it this week, so hopefully soon!  And the major highway was fully reopened today, so no more back road traffic non sense.  Yeah!  We have a field trip this week, and regular activities.  But the weather is supposed to get cooler as well.  It's only two weeks until my next minor surgery and I'm getting a bit nervous.  Life is moving at a super fast pace and there are things I need to get on top off before it's too late like going through boxes to pull out papers for Benaiah's open house in the spring or summer or fall or whenever we have it. Speaking of Benaiah, he might be promoted AGAIN very soon to Team Leader! He's only been an assistant team leader for less than a month.  Yeah! He said that management talks about him frequently in a good way and whisper in his ear how well he's doing.  They've definitely taken a shine to him, and that makes my mom heart happy.  He still wants to go to Ozark, and when I tried to bring up the fact that Ivy Tech is way cheaper if he wants a business degree, he and Grandma almost through a fit.  Grandma was trying to say that everyone needs a Bible degree if they plan to go into ministry someday.  That is true, but I don't know that he needs to do that right away and to go into major debt over it.  He could easily have $100,000 in debt even if he went to Bible college.  He doesn't realize how little he has to put towards it when he's only earning $1200 a month.  But, I held my tongue and know reality will hit soon enough. I didn't go to Bible college and am fine.  Jared had some Bible but didn't have a dual degree of Bible and Business administration.  He went back as a graduate student and did Greek and Hebrew then to get his Biblical leadership degree.  Not everyone has to go Bible college.  Good grief.

I dug out my scrunchies tonight!  Check them out!  Now, some of them have elastics that are no longer stretchy. But hey, I'm trendy, right?  Well, when I showed them to Benaiah he asked if he could borrow them for his water bottle at school tomorrow.  I told him ok, but he better not lose them.  Lol!

Hey, look! An emoji before it was actually a real thing! And the grey/purple/turquise one screams the '90's doesn't it?  Hehehe!

The Pats one by a long shot, AGAIN!

First home game for the Colts and they squeaked by with a win.  Yeah!

The End

Year 4, September 16th-19th, 2019: What a week!

Monday, Monday, typical Monday.  Abishai ended up in our bed, but we only slept until 8.  I wish it had been 9, but that's ok, Abishai is always our little guy to get us up and moving.  Jared, of course,was already out the door, so it was just me.  I just love rolling over and waking up to a little guy next to me.  It certainly doesn't happen that often, but I'll soak it in while I can.  I'm grateful that all of our kids have had pretty decent sleeping patterns and 98% of the time, they have slept in their own beds.  But there is just something special of snuggling next to a little one from time to time, especially one that will sing, "Good morning to you!" in the sweetest voice! Anyway, Justin woke up a little bit after us, but Keturah wasn't awake until 12pm!!!!  I guess Sunday wore her out again.  She also woke up with a sore ankle.  She thinks she hurt it when (get this!) she ran from the chapel back to the East Hall to pick up where they had left off in their video game! GRRRRRR. You aren't at church to play video games!  I know it's a way to connect with each other, but still, I wish they didn't.  And after the second service, she ran after Jenna and her friends, too.  Throughout the day, she seemed to ignore the pain, but then would complain about it if I asked her to do something.  Oh no, you are not milking this, child.  We can all limp from one place to another and still get stuff done, no matter how slowly we need to go.

Anyway, while I waited for Justin to do his homework so we could go over it, and Keturah to get up so I could do our together first before her other work, I puttered around picking up clutter, putting away paperwork, sending out some messages, etc. And I procrastinated yet again on calling the IRS or Medicaid about a medical bill from May.  I just don't want to sit on the phone.  But I have another chance tomorrow to do it.  Instead, after getting school done, I took Abishai to drop off recycling, visit Daddy at work (where he willingly ran 12 laps around the couches as fast as he could), and then to the library to pick up some books I had ordered and to drop off an overdue DVD.  Very necessary errands, and it helped keep Abishai from being bored, but then I wasn't home to make phone calls.  Justin had his screen time in peace and Keturah finished her homework.  She is grounded from electronics for two days again because of her shouting at me all day today.  It's pretty typical of her to do that after a day out of the house, and we do need to find a more constructive way of dealing with it.  One way is to let her sleep as long as needs to.  Another way I've been trying is to not shout back and to just ignore her comments as much as I can. And, if she's really arguing about an assignment, I throw up my hands and tell her she's going to have to do it with Dad when he gets home.  That usually does the trick.  Today was just a bit more frustrating because she was arguing about black and white instructions that were plain as day.  It's like she doesn't live in the real world and ignores what's right in front of her.  That's when I get super frustrated and start losing my cool.  Pre teen girls, at least this one, are very hard to deal with.  I'm grateful that I've had a break between the "difficult" children, i.e. Benaiah was pretty argumentative, too, and lied about doing his homework as a 7th/8th grader when I was busy with Abishai being an infant.  I've definitely learned from that and have treated Justin and Keturah differently because of that.  Justin is my peacemaker, so he tries to argue, but doesn't push very hard.  I can let him play around on his phone for awhile in the morning because I can trust he will get his homework done to almost my level of standard by lunchtime or early afternoon.

I just keep praying for a breakthrough with Keturah.  I'm not giving up, but sometimes I wish I could. I'm praying she grows out of this or I can find new ways to reach her. We have an oppurtunity to ride horses together at a ministry that a guy at a church Gary was visiting has in Ohio.  And I have every intention of trying to get over to Julie's house in Acton on a weekly basis once the weather cools down a bit and I'm passed my other surgery. I didn't start riding horses regularly until I was 13 or 14, so we still have a little bit of time to fit that in.  These are just tough years but I only have one shot at this.  I'm doing my best and God will fill in the rest.  God will grab her attention and her heart someday.  We just have to keep praying. Just like someday I will talk to my sister Kristina again.  It's been over 9 years since we have spoken, since we argued I should say.  It makes me very sad and frustrated that she won't talk to me.  But, if we both end up at my sister Stefanie's wedding next year, it's going to be awkward if we haven't tried to send some messages back and forth before then. So, I keep praying about that. As I've said before, family is the most important asset you have.   You don't get to choose your family, but you only typically have that one blood related family. So, you try to make it work at least on your end.  Sigh.

Ok, moving on.  It was a hot one again today.  I can't wait for it to cool off so I can feel safe going out again.  I had a headache come on again from dehydration today.  We don't typically take a fall break because we start so much later than everyone else, but if we have a string of gorgeous days in October, I just might and line up some fun places to go.  That all depends on how I feel after my surgery on Oct. 8th. The rest of this week is fairly quiet except for Wednesday when I have my chiropractic appointment (note to self: never go longer than 4 weeks between visits, I'm in so much pain!), and then hopefully get home in time to eat something and take Keturah to dance, Justin to small group, pick up Keturah, go to the grocery store while we wait for Justin to be done, pick up Justin and then go home for the night.  Phew! It should work out perfectly, including the added time for lots of traffic. And this week, I'm going to have Jared take the van to work so we can have a/c in the car as we drive back and forth.

For now, I'm waiting on Benaiah to get home from work because I forgot to ask him about how his piano audition went yesterday, and I like to get a sound bite of how his day went and if he needs to vent/get advice.  A lot of times he doesn't need anything, but there have been times where he has spilled his guts to me and I'm so grateful that I get to listen in to his life story.  If I can rebuild my relationship with him, hopefully I can get through this stage with Keturah and become good "friends" when she's an adult. We'll see.

Benaiah sleeping in the "football: goal" (arms above his head) position that he did when he was a baby.  Awww, big baby!

Abishai trying to figure out how to get the magnetic marbles in the right places according to colors and numbers at the library.  He didn't spend that much time playing and he asked to leave within 15 minutes or so.  But he did pick out his own books and DVD.

He even carried some of the books and insisted that we use the crosswalk.  He also asked about the bikes in the bike rack outside and why one person put their bike inside.

Bedtime reading with Daddy.

Why can't every day in a single week go well? Or rather, why can't I feel good every day for a week straight? Abishai slept with us again this morning and we didn't sleep well.  And then he was ready to get up at 8.  I had an extremely hard time waking up.  I just knew it was going to be one of those days where my patience was short and it was going to be challenged. And no, no amount of "I'm going just sing the joy of the Lord and it will all be better" will fix it.  Nope. So when Keturah woke up after 11am and then was snottier and angrier than ever and shouted at me from the get go, it didn't take me long to grit my teeth through some of it, and then give up and let Jared handle it later.  Well, he just happened to be out for the evening, so I still was left in charge.  I hate that. I'm tryng to separate the duties of teacher and parent, trying to delegate some of the teaching/parenting to Jared so I'm not so worn out, and trying to get Jared to bond with the kids more.  So I'm pretending like I'm the teaching who sent home an assignment and the parent and child have to figure out the assignment together.  That means Jared HAS to read the actual assignment and not just say, "Just get it done." He has to check it before it goes back in the "schoolbag." I know that's normally the mom's job, but since I'm the teacher, and I know there are single fathers out there, it's his turn to step up the plate. I can only take 4 hrs of being shouted at in one day. I'm just plain exhausted.

But, I did finally get a step done in figuring our 2018 taxes! I filed our taxes 7 months ago and there's no sign of a refund  And the taxpayer advocate service were the only ones who could tell me why.  Something to do with no 1099 for my schedule C! Hello! I've filed many schedule C's in the past and have never been flagged. And why couldn't the IRS just write me a letter and ask about it? Good grief!  I've never had the IRS be so non communicative whether it's been our personal taxes or when I worked as the accountant for Crescent Project.  So now our file has a case number and has been sent over to the local office downtown and they are supposed to call me on Friday.  I hate that, too.  I have to trust them to make the phone call.  And then I'll probably miss the phone call.  And they said that hopefully it would be resolved by October 31st.  Really?! I had to say we are "under hardship" because of this, and really, we are.  We've been short every month because I had to pay off a medical bill with a credit card.  And then we didn't have cash for car insurance so that went on the credit card. And then the a/c on the van went out and it needs new tires.  So, yes, we definitely qualify for hardship. But I was on the phone for over 2 hours! Which means I can't homeschool or do other things I need to do.  It's a good thing I cooked food yesterday so we could have leftovers today.  So my brain and body are fried.  At least I finally got caught up on the YouTube videos I wanted to watch.  I LOVE Apologia Church/Radio but most of their videos are an hour long.  So, it's taken a while. And I think I've deleted about 1/2 to 1/3 of the videos that the channels I subscribe to have put out in the last two months. I can't listen to the videos as I say, cook dinner, because it's too noisy and get too distracted with the chaos of life. So I can only listen/watch at night.  I know, first world problems.  Moving on.

Hm,....I wonder where I'm landing right now...

I did take note of some cool rainbows from the sunlight coming through the front door all the way to the dining room.  They moved/the sunlight shifted pretty quickly within minutes.

And then there were, too.

Abishai, Socks, and I went on a walk to Grandma's house while the weather was still cool and I was waiting for Keturah to wake up and Justin to do his work. Abishai got to play hide and seek, Scrabble, and bowling with Grandma.  Socks barked at the new neighbor's yippy dog, and played along with hide and go seek.  Abishai used Socks as his guide dog and an old wireless phone in his hunt for Grandma. It was so cute! We also saw a 4 inch cicada on Grandma's window screen!

Why is he so cute, but man, so exhausting?  Time to change the pjs he's been wearing for 48hrs. But how can he get into so much so quickly?  Although he did stay relatively quiet for 2 hrs without electronics while I was on the phone.

I spent 2 hrs on this phone call today just so they could transfer my file over to someone else who is supposed to call me on Friday just to tell me I need a 1099 and I don't have a 1099.  I think I'm going to go insane! Just give me my money dumbnuts!

Wednesdays have become exhausting days!  Well, school went well because the kids had to be up and do Grandpa Bible class at 9:30am.  Hopefully that showed Keturah that getting up when the rest of us get up helps you accomplish things sooner in your day and then you can go play instead of doing assignments right before bedtime.  The assignments that she and Dad did last night were perfectly fine and acceptable. I don't know if she's just trying to get attention and needs our time, or she's acting out because we haven't had much individual time with her lately, but she was much calmer today. But as I wrote on Facebook just now, I saw a couple of Benaiah's peers show off their early acceptance to college letters and it made me completely jealous and grieve again over how he doesn't care to do things the way I did it (aka study for and take the ACT/SAT multiple times, dual credit classes, apply to 100 scholarships, etc) and how much I've missed in the goals I had for him and each of the kids in sending him off to SCS. I'm never ok with "just good enough."  I want excellence.  And it's very, very hard to accept people who don't think that way. Jared tends to be that way, too, and it's frustrating.  And I've felt it sometimes that I want to be lazy or I give up on something for awhile, but then I dig in and get all gun ho for it again. I'm an achiever.  I'm a Type A perfectionist. I strive hard to achieve my goals.  And when I miss them, like I feel like I have with my children, I feel riddled with grief and guilt and wonder how the families I idolize do it.  Sigh.

Otherwise, the evening running around went very smoothly.  Traffic wasn't too bad. We made it to our destinations with a few minutes to spare each time. This time, we dropped Keturah off at dance, drove over to Meijer to pick up dog food, dropped off Justin at small group, went back to pick up Keturah, went back again to Aldi's (across from Meijer) for the regular groceries (before they closed at 8) and then back over to get Justin from small group.  Total time out: 3 hrs. Phew! The kids did try to help put away groceries when we got home, but I just didn't want to delegate the responsibility so I shooed them out.  Even Benaiah asked if he could help when he came home from his own small group.  He might help with transporting Justin but first wanted to figure out if his new Wednesday routine would work out.  He is using his extra time at church to do homework and practice piano for Crave. So, I powered through and now I'm done with life.

Oh yeah, and Jared keeps opening up the windows to cool the house down overnight but then we are all suffering with allergies. I just felt my throat glands and they are very swollen.  My nose was also out of control while we were out.  Ugh.  At least I got into my chiropractor today and he worked on me a bit. I feel a bit stiff still, but at least I know my back is aligned and I only had 4 vertebrae out.  Meanwhile, Abishai did his thing with playing and screentime.  He did a great job spending all that time in the car.  And he and Keturah were pretty good in the grocery store. Justin did help well when we were in Meijer for the dog food.  I detoured to look at shoes and Justin pushed me along.  I did buy some that were $9 each.  They were the same exact shoe, only different color and one was 1/2 size bigger.  I hope I don't regret buying them because I didn't get a chance to go through my normal hemming and hawing over them.  They are slingbacks with pointy toes but suede like, perfect for fall maybe? And closed toe, which I have to have because my toenails are nasty. Perfect with skinny jeans and no socks?  Perfect covered up a little bit by normal jeans so that socks can be covered?  We'll see!

Definitely need to remember this.

Hahahahaha!  This must be from another homeschooler! We seem to be the only ones to check out these kinds of books! The little yellow post its are the birth/death dates for each person.  Cracks me up!

I didn't read through it, but I thought it would be a fun review and preview to remind us of some of the important people.

And that's all the pics I took today.  Maybe I'll get a picture of Abishai's pumpkin bucket I bought him at Meijer (the kind you go trick or treating with).  He put his fruit snacks in it and says he will only eat one a day.  It's now on the dining room table.  He did associate it with Halloween because all his YouTube shows have Halloween episodes. But I tried to explain to him that we don't go trick and treating, but we do like pumpkins and carve funny faces in them.  I did think about putting out fake pumpkins at our front door this year and Aldi's had a small hay ball for sale.  I might get it next time around.  I need to pull out the fall decor anyway. Hm,....

Oh boy, where did my Thursday go? Another early start by Abishai, but he's too cute when he's asking you to get up and read to him. Once I finally go the morning routine done, Abishai and I played a regular full round with all the rules of Candyland!  Yes, I made him follow the rules this time and he actually listened and stayed in the game until both of his characters won fair and square! Grandma and I both haven't made him follow the rules of any game because he either doesn't understand or doesn't have the patience.  But now he thinks he can just make up the rules or push the pieces of the board of any game whenever he gets bored and wants to be done.  Nope, not this time, buddy.  Candyland is great practice for learning to take turns and follow the rules.  Then I let him ride his bike outside while I scrolled through my pictures to see if there were any more flowers I need to make holes for in the black netting, flowers that might have flowered and died off in the spring time.  And I'm happy to say, I got them all! Now, I think the weeds are still growing under the black stuff because it's now rising, so we need to get mulch soon.  IPL never emailed me back, so I think I'll just call up Wanamaker Feed and Seed and see what I can get.  I'd prefer to buy in bulk, i.e. put a tarp in Benaiah's truck and fill it up. That's a Jared project.

After outdoor time, Abishai and I went inside and we organized his new pj's.  He let go of most of his old pjs and it makes me sad that he and Keturah especially let go of things easily.  I do ask them multiple times and then sigh and move on myself. I do NOT want to squelch their ability to let go.  They definitely need to learn to declutter better than I do. Then we had lunch.  And then....

At around 12:55pm, I saw Socks nosing around and possibly eat the mushrooms we've been trying to get rid of for two years.  Oh my goodness, I didn't panic, but my friend's reaction made me panic.  We were supposed to go over to Leah's house for dessert to meet with some old friends from Illinois or wanted to see the kids and then I was to leave to go to my counseling appointment at 3pm.  I spent the next 90 minutes calling up the ASCPA animal poison hotline, texting Jared, Leah, and Alisha, trying to make the dog vomit, desperately looking up what kind of mushroom and fungicide it was, joining a FB group to identify the mushroom, etc. etc. Socks has had no symptoms of poisoning, but what a rush.  I'm exhausted from it, and then Abishai wondering when we are going to Grandma's. It cost $75 to talk to vet on the helpline, but then you get a case number and call back as many times as you need to without more fees.  It was definitely worth $75 to talk to a real vet instead of calling a local vet would want us to go see them and cost so much more. Basically, I didn't get Socks to vomit, and he's had no symptoms.  There's two groups of mushrooms, one affects them in 1-4 hrs and the other group affects them in 10-24 hrs.  We are passed the 9 hrs mark now so I think he's fine.

So, I took the kids and the dog to Grandma's house, so that Grandma could look after the dog and the kids could visit with the Illinois people while I went to my appointment.  They all were fine there.  I went to Kroger afterwards to find the matching white and gold pumpkin with a B on it for Benaiah, but I couldn't find the display.  Well, I went online to Kroger and found the bigger size with a B on it, in stock at our Kroger, but not at other Krogers, so, I quickly decided to try out the "pickup" service where you drive up to the side of the building and an employee loads up the groceries you bought online that they bagged up for you.  It's free for the first 3 times, so today's pickup order was free.  I did go ahead and order it online so that I would be guaranteed to get it.  But now I'm worried that they won't package up the item until the hour before I pick it up and it won't be there anymore.  I did say "substitute with a similar item" but what would be similiar? Will they contact me first? I have no idea.  Crossing my fingers because I really want to have a matching set!  I don't know why Benaiah didn't get one to represent himself in the first place.  Oh well. I'm still going to try.

Waiting on Mommy to finish with the vet so we can go to Grandma's house.  Abishai had his bag packed and ready to go 2 hrs ahead of time.  He then stayed at Grandma's until I got him.  He loves going to visit her even for an hour a time.  So sweet!  And I know she loves it, too!

What the mushrooms looked like last year.

From last August.  Ewww.....

These are the bad boys.  Jared had sprayed fungicide on it about 5 days ago and it's been dry and hot.  These have been in the yard for 2 yrs, so I don't know why Socks would possibly be interested in them. I hope he just sniffed around the grass or something.

But now I know how to handle a dog that needs to vomit.  You give them 3 tablespoons of peroxide.  I didn't have time to force feed him it but now I'll be ready for next time.  This mushroom is called armillaria, which is also called ringless honey mushrooms and low on toxicity. The fungicide is called propiconozole and is also very low on the toxicity scale.  By low I mean it's not toxic unless they ingest a ton.  Jared also mentioned that the fungus that is killing the trees is verticillium, but someone in the emergency mushroom identificaiton group said it grows on the mushroom and they are two separate organisms.  Jared's just concerned about the verticillium because it's what is affecting the trees.

These mushrooms grow in the grass that is shaded by the big tree and is about 6-10ft away from the trunk of that tree.  They showed up last year as well, but darker. So, I got  quick education on how to handle a dog that has been potentially poisoned, who to call, how much it costs, etc.  You never know when you have to quickly learn something new.  And see, this is what I mean by trying to teach the kids how to problem solve. I had to know who to contact, so I contacted my friend who probably has had to deal with it before.  Then I called that number, relayed the relevant information, found the peroxide, followed through with it (although Socks wouldn't drink it), make quick decisions about who was going to watch the dog and where while I went to my appointment, etc etc. I did alot of looking up quickly pictures of the mushrooms, joining the emergency FB group, calling the vet back, writing down the info and asking follow up questions.  I know I have more experience than they do, but that's the end goal when I say "go figure it out for yourself."  I've heard many many stories of orphaned kids 100 years ago (or more) having to figure out how to live on the streets, or how a college drop out figured out how to become a CEO of a big company, or Joseph and Mary having to figure out what to do when Jesus was born.  Surely an 11 and 14 yr old can figure out things as well.  Abishai certainly can.  He wanted a banana.  I said I would give him a half a banana when I got up.  Less than a minute later, he came in showing me half of a banana he cut himself.  He had observed how we cut bananas in half and did the same thing.  I hope he never losses that ability to observe and do.

Wow, the original bunker, probably my favorite one.  It was under the nightclub in season 1-3 I think.  Anyway, there's a short season 8 coming out of Arrow so they can do one last crossover in December/January.  I have followed along watching video about the new seasons but I'm definitely not as interested as I once was.  And I definitely am not interested in Stephen Amell's next project having to do with professional wrestling.  Nope. I've moved on.

The End