Year 6, February 26th-28th, 2021: That Was A Quick Month!

 Well, we are nearing the end of February already. Each day seems to go by so fast, no matter how much I push myself to stay on task. I always feel behind. And now I'm stuck on one piece of information in the taxes and there's nothing I can do until Monday because it's going to get fixed until we talk to the payroll person that e2 hired. This payroll thing has been nothing but a headache this year. If my taxes are wrong, I'm blaming the payroll guy. But this involves the W-2 itself so I cannot just submit it as is and hope for the best. So, I guess I'm setting it aside and working on that e-newsletter or the letter to the financial aid office of St. Francis. Or taking down the Christmas tree. Yes, you heard me right. I need to take down our Christmas tree. Keturah offered to help and I brushed her off because I put them in the box a certain way. Well, I backtracked and said that she and Abishai can at least get all the ornaments off the tree for me. And then we'll up the light up candy canes outside as well. I'll refrain from touching the garden until more growth happens or it's April. I need to leave the old growth there to protect the new growth from frost for another month or so. And then it will be time for another round of mulch! This time it won't be so bad because the kids can help more now that they can actually see where the plants grow. And we are coming up on the 1 yr anniversary of this new thing called "stay at home orders" and Covid-19 and quarantine and wearing a mask. I can't believe it's been a year of this stuff, this nonsense in my opinion. Not a history lesson or civics lesson goes by that I don't learn something else that further deepens my opinion about this whole charade. But as you can see, our Indiana state government had enough of it, too, and has gotten a bill passed in the Senate that will make sure the governor works with the legislature if an emergency order needs to extend beyond 60 days. I don't even know what phase we are in or if that is even a thing anymore. We kind of got stuck in the "wear a mask everywhere in public" stage. We've resumed most of our normal activities, so it doesn't much matter I guess. But then there's that Equality Act by the federal government yesterday. It's been said a million times, but America is in trouble. we are beyond being in trouble, we are not a free nation in principle at all. End of story.

We got our day started ok, and I tried to hold my temper. But boy, Keturah's a been a pill this week. Abishai's jumping on couch cushions finally got to me enough that I put them all away. We didn't even finish his homework today so we have to do that tomorrow. That means we didn't go to the library either. And I have the other projects plus groceries to get tomorrow. Justin struggled with math and writing this week. At least they did pretty good on their science tests. I was a little worried after I orally tested Keturah, but I think she does better if she sees the question rather than hears it. They both did a decent job of relating themselves to the characters in Uncle Tom's Cabin. I'm not going to finish listening to it, but will instead start on the next book which is 25% shorter. We did get to watch the first hour of Gods and Generals and so far so good. It is similar to the movie Gettysburg and should be because it's the same author who wrote the books and the same producer for the movies. I can definitely tell it's from 2002 but I love the cinematic music from that time period and the use of real props and extra people instead of CGI, so I'm in heaven there. And I don't really know all the details of the movements of the troops, so this should be pretty new to me. Hopefully it rocks the kids' world a bit more. I think even Abishai could watch it. Movieguide.org loved it because it included a lot of Scripture and relying on God, even in the South proving that they were still God fearing people like the Northerners and not just evil slave owners. They were fighting to protect their own private property (land and house) and their state's rights. I think watching the movie Gettysburg back when it was released in my youth made a big impact on me and opened my eyes up to seeing the South as real people. Being a northerner, there will always be a slant to teach kids that the North was right and the South was totally wrong. It's not as clear cut as that. So, hopefully I'm presenting something more even keeled to my youngin's.

Abishai was very excited about karate class and came home exhausted. Having a class at the end of the day isn't ideal, but it's going to be ok. Oh and everyone had Bible class after 4pm today which made it crazy busy for us at the usual crazy hour of doing dinner. Abishai wanted me to stay when I dropped him off so I did and talked with Shauna and the girls and got to see Benaiah. I made a casserole out of Jared's smashed potato concoction by mixing it with eggs and then putting freezer burnt breakfast sausage patties on top. We all ate it and now there's a lot less of the potatoes. It's time to go a shopping! We have milk and veggies currently, but we are out of meat, eggs, and bread. But I stretched us to 3 weeks this time! Ok, we have some beans in the pantry and some carbs. We could probably stretch a few more days, but I want Jared's help and/or I don't want to take up my precious school days for grocery shopping. Ok now what. Go to bed on time? Which I didn't do last night because murder mysteries are hard to stop mid stream and I accidentally got into a second two part episode last night. Whoops. I'm feeling it though. I should work on a myriad of things, but I won't. I'll say "I'll do it tomorrow," and then it doesn't happen then either. I'm such a procrastinator. I think I'm going to switch gears and work on that IAHE newsletter even if I don't get it finished to go out on Monday. I'll start playing around with it for a while. We'll see. I'm done.

Someone asked for TWO eggy toasts today! He was hungry!

And he nearly ate it all!

Then it was Lego time, again, which ends up pushing into school time and thus our problem. But how can you stop a work in progress from a genius?

My questions is, if half of our state's funds goes to schools, how can we have one of the worst graduation rates and a ton of poor performing schools and teachers complaining about salaries? There's got to be so much beauracy to need that much funding, and pet projects with special assemblies, and indoctrination. This seems very skewed to me.  Although we do have a balanced budget and still have money in savings, so that is something.

Now this I can thoroughly get behind. THIS sounds like the government being controlled by checks and balances like the Founding Fathers said it should be. I hope it passes the House!

Bible class with Grandpa and cousins.

Hi, cousins!

Mom, I'm strong enough to open the door now! Well, the door must have been a tiny bit open earlier when he did it, because he couldn't do it again, but he's really close. Just a few more pounds to use against the door handle and he'll have total freedom again. I can't wait!

Whoops. I do read my Bible on the Bible app, but this just shows you that good intentions are only good intentions. I bought this fancy "you can color in" Bible and this fancy cover to go with it and here it sits for the last 4 years. Whoops. Keturah needs a study Bible to do her Grandpa assignment (which she had forgotten so she's now late on) and lo and behold we don't have one of those at home. Jared thinks he has one at the office. Jared prefers less commentary in his Bible and I thought I had a Bible with some commentary but I don't, at least not on my shelves. Hm,.....I did get to look at my teen devotional Bible and found some interesting artifacts like a match that says, "CIY 1998" because the theme was "Light the Fire." And a commitment card to witness to three people: two of which were my neighbors. And I distinctly remember where and what I prayed for my dad during that event. I know I prayed for his salvation, to make it clear and known. I remember sitting on a specific curb during our devo time. I also found one of our dating photos from 1999 in front of Gary and Leah's house and Keturah was amazed that there was no front porch, there was a white picket fence, and of course the shutters were totally different. Yup. Their front doorway is a carbon copy of ours, just like the hallway to the left is also almost a carbon copy. The rest is different though. Well, the garage is in a similar spot, too. So yup, very different. And I got to peak again at one of my mom's Bibles as well. I guess Jared and I don't use study Bibles or commentaries much. I mean I do Bible studies, but I haven't read any details in the margins of a Bible in years. So, interesting times. Poor new Bible. Dusty like my spiritual life is dusty and in need of rejuvenation which is coming I think. I'm loving the Elijah Bible study we are doing. All fresh ideas. I need that. I don't want the rehash of what I've heard before in my personal study time. So, there's that.

Saturday, play day and work day. Abishai and I did schoolwork that was finished yesterday. Then I read my Bible study and exercised. After lunch I wrote out the letter for the financial aid application for one of the medical bills. I had hoped to get to finishing that and working on the IAHE regional newsletter, but, I ran out of time. I needed to go to the grocery store at a certain time so I could meet with someone to borrow a microscope for Justin. Abishai and Jared came with me and because we didn't get much fruit and veggies thanks to the misfits box, we spent less. We needed meat and boxed stuff like mac and cheese and cereal. Oh and eggs and bread. Anyway, I got a cool door stopper that has an anchor on it, perfect for the big bathroom. I moved our fox door stopper to the fireside room. He might just become a decoration, I don't know. We only need one in the big bathroom when the whole house fan is going and the bathroom window is open. Otherwise, there's no issues with any other door. I was hurting after groceries because sitting on the exercise bike is hurting my back. And that's only because I have weak core muscles so I'm trying to push through it. I'm doing arm exercises as I bike the 6 minutes I'm on it right now. That's all I can do. I'm not going to go longer very quickly because I'm not going to send myself into a fibro flare. I think I'm going to work up to 10 minutes, and then try to squeeze in 3, 10 minute sessions during the day. That seems so much more doable than a black of 30 minutes. And I mean heart pumping kind of spinning. It's on the lowest setting and my legs are killing after 6 minutes. Yes, I'm that bad. I'm looking for endurance and higher metabolism and muscle, not weight loss at the moment. I've kind of fallen off the horse on the veggie eating this week, so I'll pick that back up this week.

Anyway, groceries, then we went to 3 other stores before coming home and it was already time for dinner! Abishai desperately wanted to play the Star Wars Lego video game Benaiah saved for us when he sold his PS4 last week.  So, after his weekly bath, he and Daddy played that game and Momma rested and started the new Civil War novel for the kids' schooling. I'm already a bit lost as to who is who and which ones are white and does this take place in the north or the south. I need the cliff notes! It's Across Five Aprils and I KNOW that I read it in high school and that it covers all 5 years of the Civil War. It's a good thing I have a book with some deep thinking questions. I might need to read up on some summaries. I also caught up on my Bible reading, too, so it's been a productive day for me. Jared fixed the dining room chair Keturah broke over a week ago and glued my dresser drawer back together, so he got something done.

Oh, and Grandpa took Keturah and Justin to the AT&T store so Justin could have his glass screen protector replaced and Keturah could get a SIM card and phone number for her phone. What I didn't mention to him at first is that Keturah is currently grounded from the phone. But I seized the opportunity to delegate this task to someone else because it's been on my list for 3 months. Texting is much harder when both parties don't have a phone number and Evelry and Nora don't have phone numbers. But Keturah's friends from church do. So I'm hoping she can text them more and even call them when she's bored. Maybe? Grandpa was concerned because we usually wait until they can pay for their phone lines but I told him I'm willing to pay for it or split it with her and give her more chores to do around the house and more one off projects like the outdoor work that will begin soon. It felt great to cross that one off my list. Now we have 7 people on one phone account and on average, it costs just $25 per phone because of Gary's long relationship with AT&T. And for the most part, we don't have much issues. And we have unlimited data (until a certain point and then the data speed slows down). And we all pay Grandpa of our phone lines. It's what works and it's cheapest. So, check that off the list!

Then I spent too much time lounging on the couch and I'm so tired. I did try to back up my bedtime from 2:30 to 1:30 to 1:10 last night. I'll aim for 1am tonight. Jared isn't happy with it, but he's also in more physical pain because he had to go off his pain medications before his steroid injection this coming Wednesday. This coming week isn't too busy, thankfully. But now the weather is a bit warmer so I want to shoo the kids outside more. Abishai wants toys like a pretend campfire or Little Tykes play house with a stove and I told him to just pretend with the elements around him! A leaf is a play, a stick becomes a fork, and food is pine needles and pine cones. Come on! Imagination! Drape the beach towels over the tree house to make a wall. Drag out a sleeping bag and an outdoor cushion. Just bring that stuff back in at night. I don't care if some toys go out during the day but they have to come in at night. It's going to rain tomorrow otherwise I would shoo them outside. I will try to do that after lunch or between 2 and 3pm before screen time. And soon, it will be light out still during 5-6pm and they can go back outside then, too, and after supper. Oh, and I also trimmed the dogs' fur on his paws today because I'm tired of pulling on them to get the mud off. When I did so, I discovered two pads on two different feet are irritated. I'm going to let it go for a couple of days and then check again. It could be from all the extra moisture constantly being in his feet, even after getting him wiped up thoroughly. Or it could be something more. He did pull away from the worst foot so it is tender. There didn't seem to be an actual injury, but who knows what he might have accidentally stepped on leaving a bruise or something. Bummers. I'm glad I got a chance to look at his feet. Poor old guy.

And now, it's the end of the day. Again. And what have I done? Nothing that matters much it seems, but it all adds up. A sweet young mom was struggling today and shared it on Instagram. I know she doesn't really know me, but her mom was one of my mentors in MOPS. So I tried to share some encouraging words with her that she is doing some things right and it's ok to hit a wall and be upset at the kids. And we will never give our kids a perfect childhood and that's ok. That's why there is a God to fill in those holes and be the perfect parent, although I doubt this sometimes myself. She just had her third baby in 5 years a few months ago, so I know she's dealing with "putting out fires" thing like I did. And they've moved into her parents' house temporarily while they build a house, just like her sister did. And it's ok. Her mama is right there and her dad is retired and doesn't talk much but will build things and do things for the kiddos. She's got some extra help, which can be hard sometimes, too. She'll get there, and her house will be built, and she'll get to set up house again and she will get settled again. The MOPS stage is a hard one. That's why there is MOPS. And I wish she would join a group, but, to each their own.

But I know the feeling of shame and guilt. I have it all the time. I bopped Abishai on the head yesterday after he flailed around again on all the couch cushions while doing read alouds and school work. And then I made him put everything away because they had been out all week and I was tired of the mess, the worry of dog hair over all the blankets and pillows and cushions and the randomness happening in the corner of my eye while I'm reading. I was done. And that's ok. Kids need to know that all humans have limits. Abishai needed another little pop on the behind today because he still wasn't sitting still enough for a little bit of schoolwork. Sigh. He's a tough one that I need to focus on, too. And Keturah's attitude has been horrendous this week. So, yup, still not a great parent. Guilty as charged. But what can we do? We can only do so much. And then the end of the day comes. And the rest has to wait until tomorrow. If we applied ourselves all day, tried to put the phone down, tried to pay attention, then we will be ok. My addiction to my phone actually slows me down enough to not overdo it and send myself into a fibro flare. I'm trying to embrace this balance we have. I take my mornings very slowly and then feel like I need to push and rush in the afternoon. It's hard. But I want to stop feeling guilty about the phone. I'm usually eating and reading emails. Or listening to something and playing my video games. My ears are listening, and my fingers are busy. And if that's a part of being ADD, I will embrace it and not apologize for it. In fact, I played my games while we listened to the video for our Bible study this week. It's hard to play games when you hear so much good stuff you want to write down. But of course I put the phone away when we had our discussion time. And that's that.

Come on, Melinda, get ahead of the game! But Alas, I can't keep the characters straight and my mind starts to wander off, especially when I get interrupted!

Last bit of snow to melt. Then it's outdoor playtime every day!

Abishai's build for today. A boat (that he said he snuck out of his room). He belt beds for the guys, a cmeara off the back of the boat, a computer and steering wheel in the cockpit which is on top of another room, and has a large glass window to see through, just like a real ship! We tried to convince him that the bottom room could be a galley or mess hall for food prep and eating, but he said the guys would just get food from the islands they visited if they didn't have to fight any bad guys. But dude, you have to have a place to prepare the food. What a genius though with all the details!

When one of your kitchen chairs are broken and you don't normally all sit down together for lunch, someone has to sit on the stool or kneel. It was Daddy's turn. Keturah said he looked like a bald headed baby. Maybe the Boss Baby from that movie by that name?

I didn't realize I caught his face like this. Bwahahahaha! And yes, food with a side of tylenol. Always when you are 41 and are in a lot of physical pain.

It's spring! The daffodils are starting to come up. We'll trim away the debris once the risk of frost is almost over.

The irises are working their way up, too.

Leftover remnants of snow piles.

Super warm today! Felt weird to go to the grocery store without a jacket!

Another month and another purchase from Lego.com. What could it be and who is it for this time?

I had it on my secondary list to take down the tree today, but at least I put away the light up candy canes from outside. We can work on the tree this week. Meanwhile, I'm still enjoying the way the lights dance on the ceiling.

The white lights on the ceiling stay up year round to add light to this room. They make a great nightlight for me when I have to sleep on the couch.

I love how the Christmas lights shines on the other stuff, too.

Daddy slicked little man's hair back after his bath. What a big forehead he has!

It took several minutes to get him to sit still fro these photos. He just gets so distracted. And we are working on our cheesy smile!

Sunday, rainy day. The middles went with Grandma and Grandpa to first service, Jared had nursery duty, Abishai went to his class, and I sat in my favorite spot high up in the balcony, when Jared isn't with me. Good service. Great songs. The topic was "Isn't Science enough?" Yeah! A bit of apologetics/theology or whatever! We had one Scripture, lol. But Dan did a great job showing how some of the top notch scientists are Christians, or have become Christians after their years of research. And science doesn't explain everything in the physical or the metaphysical world. He just scratched the surface but hopefully small groups will have some great discussions this week. I WISH we could talk about this in our group, but the Elijah study is really deep, too. The fun thing was that I finally saw a finally not wearing masks in church! And I know that they volunteer at church, too. That has now given me the courage to buck the trend and I didn't wear my mask while I was in my seat. Jared is concerned about getting sick before his procedure on Wednesday and he will be immune compromised for a bit, so I'll wear a mask when social distancing isn't possible. But I've made a decision that on Easter Sunday, I'm no longer wearing a mask at church. Not sure if I'll do it at the grocery store. I might get bolder by then when the vaccination numbers go up. They are hoping to get 85% of people vaccinated by summer. I will be part of the 15% that won't be. And now I just read that there might be a "vaccination passport" to get into Israel. Um, no, I'm not doing any of that. I still need to discuss this with the others. But that made me happier today to see that I wasn't alone and that it won't affect your ability to volunteer at church in certain ways. Of course, with little kids, it might be wise to wear the mask until flu season is over. I never wear a mask at Bible study or at MNO or at park days and we've been fine. I'm not sick. I'm not the enemy. I'm done with it.

We had lunch at Gary and Leah's and then came home for naps and screen time. I drank to much caffeine but it helped me put together the IAHE newsletter! Woot! Woot! That came together much faster than I thought. It isn't perfect. I want to fix a few things for future ones, but it's good enough to get started with. Hopefully it will go out this week! I also crunched the numbers for the taxes and W-2 and the HSA stuff. The payroll person screwed it up big time. I could do a better job than he or she has done. It's a mess. I mean I worked with payroll people and I was the accountant for Crescent Project for almost 2 years. I certainly could do a better job than this person. But I don't have time. So, I figured it out and made notes. And then, when Benaiah graduates with his CPA license, he can have e2 as one of his clients. Sigh. But I feel good that I figured it out and that I haven't wasted the whole weekend.

Abishai played with Daddy on the Star Wars Lego game and loves it! And the kids had a good time at their youth group thing. And that's about it. Time for a new week. Fairly quiet on the doctor appointment front. Next week though I have some telehealth appointments. This week Jared has his steroid injection and all that. It should be interesting. I'm a bit annoyed that everything is delayed it seems medically. I just want to hurry up and get to the things that will really help. I'm just glad that I get to talk to a different psychiatrist and a endocrinologist in 10 days. Woot! Woot! Praying that we both get some progress toward healing.

Nice one, Michael W. Smith! Secret Ambition video!

I realized that we never got a photo last summer of Abishai in front of the Kindergarten room at church because we weren't holding in person services. So while we were waiting for the doors to open, we grabbed a photo. He did NOT want to take off his mask. How sad is that?

At least I got him to put his mask below his chin. It won't be long and he'll be in Grandma and Justin's room!

Um, I didn't know hanging up clothing was a good use of a drum kit? Bwahahaha, he said he just hadn't put his clothes away yet. Some days, he is just like his dad, who occupied this room for half of his childhood. Cracks me up!

Abishai wanted me to take photos of his boat before he destroyed it to make something else.

I moved our new but cheap skeleton over to protect the treasure on the island, aka the St. Patrick's Day fake clover plant.

This is how we in the 90's started the trend of making thumb holes. Bwhahahaha, I don't care if I still dress sometimes like I did in the 90's. It's not quite the style now, but I still like a t-shirt and then button up shirt, usually flannel. I can only fit in this one though and it makes me super sad.

Thanks Big Brother Miah for saving this Star Wars Lego game. Daddy finds it frustrating, but I heard lots of giggles from Abishai!

The End