Year 7, March 28th-April 3rd, 2022: Humming Along

 Monday/Tuesday - The Blahs

- It's been a blah kind of two days. It's been very, very cold, like 45 degrees with big wind chills so wear a winter hat and coat kind of cold. Never put away the winter gear until the end of April I say. I'm emotionally and mentally and now physically exhausted. I think I have the newsletter pretty much done. I had hoped to do some fun things with the kids this week because we had more time not picking up Justin at 2:30 but then I have to make supper after I pick him up at 4 so I can get him back at 6, so it's not working out. I'm tired of typing and analyzing everything. I just want people to like me as I am. I don't want to be someone I'm not. I want to go where I can be who I am, quirky, geeky, and weird. I don't want to change. And I'm tired of being yelled at and told that I'm wrong and I can't. How about yes! and sure! and I'll get that for sure! Let me help you! What can I do for you? Is there anybody out there that has time for me? Someone there to lighten my burden instead of add to it? Where's my helpers? Where's my encouragers? But there's no one, not one. 

- And then, I have no energy left for that cool art project or science experiment. I can't even plan for it. Or a park day. I have no breaks in my schedule and my body hurts to the point of tears. I have no one to wipe them away. Or to rub my legs or my back. I'm alone. With a husband who has his own problems and sleeps with ice packs and then a hot pad, we don't even go to bed at the same time. We are ships in the night shuttling kids back and forth and no one sits down to eat at the same time. Ouch, there goes my ears, probably another ear infection. Because mommy doesn't have time to rest. No time to shower, which means she didn't have time to put on deodorant or brush her hair which was going to put on after the shower that was supposed to happen this morning. She barely had time to go get her medication that she was late on. And I had to wait in line for 30 minutes listening to the worst baby boomer whiners of the world for those 30 minutes. They obviously are privileged people. Transfer your scripts somewhere else and get out of our line. Problem solved. 

- I weep for all.

Every day this week, except for Wednseday, feels like this. 45-50 degrees will be the high for this week and next at least. 75 degrees on Wednesday! The old restless legs, knee joints and back HATE this kind of back and forth weather.

Good bye forever. I will never take one of these bad boys ever again. Nope. I don't need to take tests for the flu, why do I need to take tests for Covid? Just nope. We spent $16 on this last fall I think. Now they are free. We didn't apply for the free ones. This one finally expired. Into the trash bin it goes. Good riddance. It was only approved for emergency use anyway. Not even fully approved by the FDA. Such a crock. Justin tested positive with one of the tests when we had Covid in October (he did have symptoms and he was the one exposed 5 days earlier), Keturah tested negative and had symptoms. They were not that reliable and when I took one at Christmas the previous year, it was negative, but I'm not so sure I hadn't had it. I don't know. It's not worth the anxiety.

Cold. Just plain cold.

I truly believe that. They learn when they learn. Steady on forward, step by step. All of ours have learned things eventually and I haven't track of exactly when. So when family members say, "Well didn't so and so read this or that or memorize this or that when they were this or that age?" I say, I don't know, I don't remember and it doesn't matter. Each kid is different. And we are working on this or that now. And they've progressed from here to here this year and that is good. Each child will get as far as they will get in every subject. Some will get through calculus and some will barely get through Algebra. And both paths are ok.

A song that comes out on Friday! Woot! Woot! VERY quick turnaround as he just polished it off last Thursday. So the distribution piece was extremely quick. It doesn't always happen that fast. It's just a one off single song. Not part of a record as of yet. I'm sure it will be added to the next record he does, whenever that is.

Someone decided to take a selfie this morning.

He also said he took pics of Justin and Keturah.

I love having photos from his eye level. Look at the pretty colors from the twinkly lights!

I love his wrinkly nose! And his geometric shapes.

He kept repeating "I'm a mad scientist!" I said yes to the colored water because I was in a mood and then this replaced me reading to him. He still did his written pages.

I'm a Mad Scientist!!

It had been awhile since we had done this and he could a lot more on his own with making a mess. He also observed more and had more comments to make. And we got to go over a few things from our recent science lessons.

Like how mixtures work, dilution, molecules, atoms, etc.

I forget what this process goes, but it has to do with gravity and pressure I believe. It was cool to see how it worked by how the colored water was replacing the clear water.

We eventually had to clear out some of the colored water before we overflowed everything.

And then, the inevitable happened and he did overflow it on purpose. Sigh. And after a few more minutes, it was time to clean up.

Science Experiments

 I spent 30 minutes in line at the pharmacy waiting on some very necessary meds and looked over and saw a table and chairs set that I could have plucked straight out of my childhood. In fact, we still have the table. Ours is a bit smaller and lighter, but it's almost identical. I think I have the chair, too, and it's in our room. Maybe. If not, I do remember it very well. Very vintage, at least vintage for me. I didn't check the price. It was nice to see it after listening to two baby boomers whine about how awful it was to stand there waiting for meds. The pharmacy was going as fast they could. I know my pharmacy very well. But they've had a lot of staff turnover and who knows what else has gone on in the industry. And if you don't like it, go to another pharmacy. And if this pharmacy is the cheapest, then shut your mouth and wait. Pick your battles. It is the closest and easiest and cheapest for us and usually I don't have to wait this long. So, I waited no biggie.

Comfy much?

Bwahahahahah!

Wednesday - Change of Plans

-Well, that was a wildly different day than expected! We had planned to go to ASL, then the park, then pick up Justin, have dinner, drop off Justin, etc. but,.....

-....when I turned to go north on Post Rd near the softball field, I went kerthunk, right into the big pothole that was there! Keturah said, uh, Mom, I think something is wrong, and I heard it, too. Hissssss.....thunk, so I actually thought quickly and put my blinker on and turned onto the smaller road next to the ball fields. And sure enough, I put holes in my tire. Shoot! I had a flat tire within a couple of minutes! I called Jared immediately because I was not going to handle this myself. Yes, I'm a big girl who can figure stuff out. But we were close to home and he's done the tires so many more times, it's just quicker for him to handle it. I did go into the trunk and clear out the stuff so we could get to the spare tire and all that. And thankfully, this car has a spare tire in perfect working order and kit to go with it. We haven't always been so fortunate. And I/we don't always think to double check that we do. So, we went through that whole process. It didn't take long because we didn't have any complications. Jared had to use his foot to help loosen the lug nuts using the lug wrench because he didn't want to be twisting his back too much but other than that, not hard. He got the old tire into the van to deal with and I limped straight home. I had already texted ASL to say we weren't coming. I didn't want to complicate things by finding a ride or anything. 

- Once I got home, I told the park day ladies I was just going to stay home (again to keep things less complicated). And then I got Leah to take care of Justin transportation from church to home at 4 and then back to church at 6 for his Serve Week stuff. Then Jared just had to worry about Abishai's Tang Soo stuff as normal. I don't know if Jared got a new tire or fixed it today or not. We have an appointment in Greenwood tomorrow but we would have to go super early to do something with it because we have to come right back after the appointment to be home in time for Tang Soo. We already have to have Leah pick up Justin from church as it is and that was preplanned because of the appointment. Sigh.

- Thankfully, I think it's just the tire as I was just coming away from a stop sign and was not up to speed yet. The car handled fine on the ride back to the house. We weren't going fast, we had working tools and spare tire, Jared works nearby, we have another vehicle we can use, Grandma can help, I can rearrange our life, etc. Loads of things to be thankful for. Oh and that it wasn't one of the other 6 days of the week this week when it's been/going to be freezing! The high was 72 today!

- Well, we gained some extra time at home today, but I just didn't feel like digging into schoolwork because of the fine weather, so I gave Abishai the day off sort of speak. We will catch up on Friday instead, which is the day we usually don't do any paperwork. Instead, I made us all go outside for 2 hrs. They just played and I worked in the flower beds. I needed to pull the dead stuff out that I leave as protection for the plants all winter now that the green bits were starting to poke through. I got all of that done. Plus, I went around along the brick and dug down under the dead grass clumps and pulled it up by its roots. From the grass clippings that are never blown out of the flower beds to the grass that comes up between the brick wall, there's this nice line of grass root that connects all the clumps of grass together and it annoys me to death because all I can usually get is the grass itself. So, after 3 hrs of work, I was able to get a lot of it up. So now, all I have to do is fluff up the current mulch and get a load of new mulch to put on top. I think this year will be the last year we will get a full load for the flower bed because it's going to overflow. And then maybe we'll just need a few bags next year. Unless we mulch around more of the trees, which would be nice so we don't have to trim them so much. I do have to trim the bushes better this year, and I want to hire someone to dig up that awful vine that grows with such vigor under our bedroom window. And then put some dirt there and reseed it. I don't want more flower bed there. I've got enough. So that's my mini project. On another spring day, I'll think about weeding around the other parts of the house. But my main concern is always the front. I've worked hard on those beds for 5 years now. Can't stop now.

- In the middle of my wedding, Grannie Annie comes up behind me on my sidewalk and startles me! She was out for a walk in a winter coat and hat! It was 70 degrees at this point, but I don't blame her. The wind was pretty fierce. Grannie Annie will be 95 years old in a few weeks. She was a bit winded coming up my driveway though. She said it takes her a few days to get all the way through weeding her flower beds. Yes, this woman weeds her flower beds, and mows her lawn if we neighbors don't get it done for her first, and she bakes and cooks and walks the neighborhood. She laps us 40 yr olds in just about anything, I tell ya! She did say she has a walker with a seat for times when she goes to the mall. Thank goodness! We all try to get her to rest and we try to take care of her. But she just won't stop. She's out lived her daughters by quite a number of years now. One of her granddaughters lives with her, but she has some issues, so they take care of each other. Anyway, the best part of her visit was when Abishai showed Grannie Annie how he makes a basket with his basketball. Well, he did, and THEN Grannie Annie asks him for the ball! And she shoots AND SCORES a basket!!! Now, the basket wasn't that tall, it was sized at Abishai's level, but still, here's this 95 year old woman, spry as anything, throwing a basketball into a hoop like she's 40. Good grief! She is something else! And this woman keeps popsicles in her fridge for not only her great grandkids, but all the neighbor kids. I can't even with this woman. She's the best Christian woman in the world. If only I had her heart, her mind, her physical abilities. But when you live through the Great Depression, WWII, many Presidents, wars, inventions, crisis, and have a faith like hers, you have to be as strong as an ox and then some. What a generation she comes from. It's incredible. Her, Grandma and Grandpa Cook, Queen Elisabeth II. Amazing people. These are people I look up to. My own Gramma and Grampa Koski also were of that generation, born in something like 1905 and 1910. My Howell grandparents were born in 1925 and 1927 I believe as well. Just amazing. There will never be a generation like them. Sorry baby boomers, but you guys were privileged beyond belief and then we were, as a whole, obviously each family has it's own story. Can you tell I LOVE older people?

- And I wish I were like them. But I'm just a spoiled xennial. And what's that? Well, it's a micro generation between Gen X and millennial that covers those born between 1977-1985 according to wikipedia. Like we remember life before and after the internet, before and after the cell phone. We bridge the gap between boomers who still need help navigating technology and millennials who are pros at it. Basically we were in high school in the 90's. I'm safe. I have food. I have time to delve deep into my soul and explore my emotions because I'm having to look for my next meal and I don't have to worry about being drafted into the army. I mean on a grand scale. Of course some families go through this. But not everyone on your street at the same time. It's not the Great Depression. Even 2020 wasn't the Great Depression. Government won't let it get that bad, that's why we have hyper inflation. I digress. I don't know what real life is like. I feel like I do, but not really. I don't live in the Ukraine. I don't live in abject poverty. I haven't lived long enough to be that wise yet. And yet I'm wise enough to know some things. I don't know. I just feel like I'm never going to be like this "Greats." They are way out of my league. I'm a nobody who can't put her stuff together and looks up "highly sensitive person" blogs every week. That's the millennial side of me, isn't it? Then the Gen X kicks in and says, wait a minute, we survived running around the neighborhood without a cell phone, pull yourself up and get back out there. No wonder I'm a mess. Like today, we changed courses and it was a good day.

- Yes, I like days like today when I feel I can have a legit excuse to stay home. I did work on my computer for a little bit to meet a deadline. I did have to take a break from weeding to make a 1 hr phone call. And that's why school didn't get done. But, like I tell other homeschool parents, make lots of effort in the winter months and on rainy days to do bookwork and read alouds, so you can use the spring and fall sunny days to be outside. Every day is a learning day, so count every day, but just change up what you do with what the weather does. I was in the dirt, and dirt is good for you. Very grounding. Sunshine, too. Laughter between Keturah and Abishai as they rolled down the driveway on penny boards. They barely argued about being outside. They got their screen time outside. They carried a few sticks to the backyard for me. It was a gym day for them. Keturah did some bookwork. Abishai will do schoolwork on Friday instead and today was his once a week freebie. Mental health and education is just as important as book education. Oh, and we looked at the seed pods that the blooms from our magnolia tree are covered in. I had never seen them up close before and we gathered them up. They are furry! So that's our science today. And Abishai and Keturah made a drawing with chalk. That's art. And both helped with the tire, so that's life skills and shop. We covered enough to call it a school day. Yup.

- Justin got to be outside painting the basketball court of Thomas Gregg elementary school, the school that we help through the church. And then, one of the parents got the kids a suite at the fieldhouse to watch the Pacers' basketball game this evening. So they squeezed 30 kids and adults into a suite. The suite life for Justin! Nice! I don't know if he's ever been in a suite before. I've been in them twice now. It's a great way to watch a game or concert or event depending on where exactly the suite is. I enjoyed the food when I went to the Michael W. Smith Christmas concert, but the suite was at the opposite end of the venue than the stage and I couldn't see anything in person. I had to watch the screens. It kind of sucked actually. I would have rather been in regular seats on the side. But for a basketball game, a suite is very nice because the action goes back and forth. I've in the rafters for a basketball game before and it's still pretty good. Justin has been to a Pacers' game before and I'm sure most of the kids have. But nobody has been in a suite before I bet. Sweet! Shoot, I hope he wore something decent! Probably not. Oh well.

- And that's it. That was a our weird day. Now it's started raining and the temperature will drop back down to near freezing. Big storms passing through from here to New Orleans and up to mid Canada. Lots of storm warnings, tornado warnings, lots of wind, etc. It should be a fun night. Busy day tomorrow and a slower day at home on Friday. Gym days are official done, but I think our park day will be canceled because of weather, too. But who knows, Friday is April 1st after all. Either way, I promise we would get together with Kya since he hasn't seen her all week. Poor Justin!

So this is what Keturah was helping Jared with a couple of weekends ago.Wow. I have no words. Today sort of got away from me to give Jared a proper thank you. But that's amazing. I'm not sure what I'm going to do with it yet so I'm leaving it right now. Hopefully it will stay safe. I'll see it every day because it's directly opposite of my green couch. Basically you'll see in the next few photos how he took two boards and layered them together. He used his favorite red stain to make it two toned. Wow.

It's been 10 years since our March visit where we picked out our house in Canada, Benaiah and I saw sea ice for the first time, met the Newsboys in Manchester, NH's airport, and really made it real that we were moving to Canada. I think Jared this in response to my reaction talking about coming back from Canada during a counseling session a few weeks ago. 10 years.

The red leaf is inlaid into the the lighter part.

Two layers of wood.

That's sad. FYI, we consider Benaiah to be the youngest of Millennials although this one puts him in Gen Z. He was born in 2002, and he is 20 yrs old. The other two are solid Gen Z and I'd have to say, sometimes, I do see that, but it's also hard to say since I'm around Christian families exclusively.

Exactly.

That's me the past few days.

I think I'm a highly sensitive person, but I'm trying to figure out how far I want to take this knowing I don't want to get too deeply into that label without a counselor or Christian piece to it. So I'm exploring this concept right now.

Already warming up for the day.

Yup. It happened. On a pothole just outside of Wanamaker near the softball fields. Thankfully, right after a stop sign. Bummers. Just a tire. Hissss.....I tried to stop it with my finger. No such luck. It was flat within a minute or two.

Daddy to the rescue.

Good thing this car has a good spare and flat tire kit! And today is much warmer than yesterday!

Don't lose the lug nuts like Ralph did in The Christmas Story! Keturah and I kept thinking about the bad word that Ralph said in the movie and how the movie said "fudge" instead. The funny thing, Abishai DID drop one!

Ok, time to limp home.

I guess Jared decided to take photo of the pothole. I'm not sure he got the exact same one, but I'm pretty sure it was one very similar to this. The potholes between our house and this little side street are very bad. The streets are not major thoroughfares for the community so they haven't been done yet. They usually do get to them eventually. I should have known better. And I have been avoiding this particular one for the last two months. Sigh.

Some screenshots of the fun Justin's been having. They went rock wall climbing on Monday night.

They helped a ministry move locations or set up some stuff on Tuesday.

They cleaned up stuff at church on Monday.

Pretty warm on Wednesday.

And the temps drop right back down again. My body hates this so much.

The only before photo I have because I always forget the before photos. I left up the tall dead stuff for the birds and to protect the plants below. Now I just hope I didn't uncover everything too soon.

Giggles happening behind me.

I think Abishai might have drawn the Razor Crest on the left side (or maybe Keturah?) and then the rainbow was Keturah.

We found these furry things on our driveway and then in the yard today. They are the seed packets/blossoms for the _____ tree out front. But your eyes aren't deceiving you. You are looking at fur! The outside of the packet is as furry and soft as a lucky rabbit's foot (yes, those things from the 80's/90's). I had no idea that a seed could feel soft! It's the weirdest thing in the world.

This is how I found it on the driveway. I thought it was baby bunny ears at first.

I turned it over and saw, oh, it's a seed/blossom covering! How cool!

Abishai decided to collect a few more today. I guess we just never realized that they were on the tree. That tree always blooms so fast, too. We were just in the right place at the right time.

Nice and clean ready for the new stalks.

Look at all the new green plants! Then after this next set of cold weather, we'll loosen up the current mulch and have Wanamaker Feed and Seed bring us one more big load to finish out this flower beds. 3 hrs of work because I dug deep to get out the grass roots that were starting to take over.

Families that storm together, stay together. Gotta love this storms that go all the way north to Hudson Bay all the way to Chalmette. Aaron was standing by for tornadoes and flooding.

And a few hours later, she has hit land! Loads of wind and rain. It will be here all night, too. Fun times!

I grabbed a screenshot of someone's video that was there with Justin at the suite life so I could figure out where they were sitting. Nice view! Justin said it was fun and Boomer, the mascot, came to see him in the suite!

And then, somebody must have known somebody, because they were told to wait around for a bit after the game. And they got to go out onto the floor after the game! Say what?! Jealous! An NBA game?! Nice! I'm sure all the sportsy people were thrilled! At least Justin took this photo for me. Nice one! Justin said he bought one 24oz bottle of pop at the concession stand and it cost him $6!!! What a rip off! I told him it was going to be really bad. Poor guy. And they don't let you bring in any outside drinks and food. It's horrible. It's plain stupid. They don't need that profit margin. And yet, people pay that. Anyway, Justin said the game had a good turn out. The Pacers lost by a little bit, but it wasn't a bad ball game. One more day of serve week left!

Wow, the winds ware so strong, it below things around while the window remains closed. Crazy weather.

Big Storm A' Brewing

Thursday - Not Enough Caffeine in the World

- There is not enough caffeine in the world to wake me up enough and help me concentrate enough to talk to a counselor today. Not enough at all. Caffeine does not replace real sleep. And why am I sleep deprived? Let me recount the ways. Restless leg syndrome. FOMO. Stupidity. Stress. Hard relationships. Fear. Anxiety. Stupidity. Physical pain. Yup. All of them. I don't even know what we will talk about. I don't have a plan. I just know I'm exhausted. I'll have to rely on someone else to carry the conversation. I hate going in under prepared. It always feel like a waste of money and this one is super expensive. Ugh.

- BUT we had a good morning today with school. The kids had Bible class with Grandpa. I had a phone appointment with my gynecologist about the ovarian cysts. We determined, once again, to just keep on trucking. And if I need surgery to remove fibroids again, we will look at removing the cysts. Otherwise, those bad boys can stay in there until I die. Unless I have other symptoms or they grow bigger. And she said that a lot of times they shrink when hormones change during menopause. So, just get a quick ultrasound every year before my annual and I'm good to go. Same as the pap smear and the mammogram. Easily done, usually covered at least somewhat by insurance. No problem. Then we cracked on with school and I didn't let Abishai mess about. I threatened him with the timer and taking away screen time 15 min at a time and it actually helped him make quicker decisions and get done. Then we did history while he ate lunch. And we were done by 1pm. It's a miracle!

- After that, Keturah and Abishai walked over to Grandma's house with Socks because Grandma is dog sitting Morgan, Miss Mary and Dan's dog, and Keturah wanted them to meet. She said there was some growling, a lot of sniffing each other, and then for 10 minutes outside, there was a war on who get the most pee on one spot. They are both males and both big dogs. Oh boy. And then more sniffing and eyeballing each other and some treats inside. Keturah didn't notice what their tails were doing. They weren't together long enough to see if they would eventually ignore each other, but I think they would. They are both large dogs that are well loved and well behaved in genera. Morgan is lab or retriever mix. Gorgeous black thing who loves water and fetching things and going for walks and is extremely active. He takes over Miss Mary's Facebook page to tell us what he's been up to. It's hilarious. I think he's 7 or 8 years old, so not too young.  Keturah said Socks was dragging big time on the way home. Way too much sniffing and keeping up with a younger dog. 

- Kind of like me trying to keep up with the more fit and/or younger women. Oh me, oh my. I forgot that I'm out of shape and that I have fibromyalgia. Three hours on all fours, and occasionally leaning over and I'm as sore as I would be after an hour at the gym on leg AND a bit of arm day. But mostly leg day. I'm so sore! I know I was feeling shaky when I was on all fours, but I thought it was from low blood sugar. I had just eaten a good sized piece of pizza and drank coffee with sweetened creamer so I had had plenty of calories and carbs, so it was weird to feel that way. Now I know why. My muscles were actually fatigued! Whoops! I'm glad I got it all done in one go though. Because I wouldn't be able to go out and try again for a week. Plus it's only 40 degrees. But from below my knees all the way up to my lower back, and then a bit of my shoulders blades is so sore! I lathered them up in some of that naproxen cream stuff that Jared has and it took the edge off for a bit. But I'm walking around like a rode a horse for hours. I'm definitely NOT like Grannie Annie probably was at age 40. She's allowed to complain at her age of 95 and feel this way. I'm not allowed. Ok, I'm allowed, I am weak and I do have fibro, but it just reminds me why I don't exercise. I hate exercising. I hate feeling like this. I'd rather just move slowly through life at the same rate of speed. Grannie Annie talked about having one of those walkers with a seat. I might have to get me one of those next time we go to a theme park. I can always just put it in a wagon or something. There's no shame in a 40 year old using a walker if they have disabilities. Anyway, I'm sore. It hurts. 

- Well, the afternoon was a crazy mash up of being late to just about everything. Somehow Justin got home while Jared and I barely got to our appointment. Traffic was bad as usual on the way home. Then Jared to go to the post office to drop packages for e2. All of that made Abishai nearly 15 minutes late for class. I wish our appointments were at 2 and not 4 but Jared insists on making them at the end of the day and going through rush hour traffic. And then he growls at the traffic the whole way home. Ok, well then the appointments can only happen on Tuesdays. I'm done with Abishai being late. I didn't eat until 8pm either. But at least Keturah, Justin, and Abishai handled everything well. I'm grateful for that. 

- Everybody is just tired. I'm sore. Abishai worked really hard at Tang Soo tonight and the rest of his friends did, too. They actually listened and obeyed for once. Justin is exhausted from the week of serving and people time. And Jared seems spent as well, especially after our session today. It was a lot. I could go sleep right now. Sigh. I'm glad I wrote most of today's entry this afternoon because if I hadn't, it wouldn't have sounded as good. Oh, and the IAHE newsletter finally went out today. 

- So, off to do photos, vids and maybe enjoy a show. TGIF!

I pulled off a few more screenshots of Justin with the Serve Week crew from Instagram. Here they are at the game last night with Boomer, the Pacers' mascot.

And then again on the court of the fieldhouse, whatever it's actual name is these days (it started off as Conseco, then Bankers Life, and now it just changed to something else).

This is what they actually worked on all day, repainting the courts at Thomas Gregg Elementary School.

Everybody did really well concentrating on their moves tonight. They worked on doing these very precisely, too. Well done everyone!

So cute!

You can always tell it's Justin from the mop of hair on his head, lol, although, if you scroll through the pics, there's many boys with the same long hair. Some part it down the middle and use gel to keep it out of their eyes, though. I would call it a new trend, but it's been the same trend since I was in high school.

See the guy to the right side of Justin? That's Abram, his hair is long and he parts his down the middle. Hard to believe Justin will be a senior next year, top of the classes of this youth group. Craziness. Wasn't Benaiah just in this spot?

Friday - 

- It's been a decent day. School got done. Justin slept until 12pm. He grumped his way around when he did get up. Abishai played around with the couch cushions before, during, and after school. Keturah did her work. We did some history. I stayed on top of email. I didn't quite do my video games for the day, but whatever.

- Jared and I actually exchanged words in real life for once. 

- Jared had Justin put my new tired on the car. Justin wasn't terribly happy about that. Then I found the price of that new tire on the bank account. $200! Yikes!

- Kellie and Kya came over for a visit. We didn't go to the first park day of the season because it was 45 degrees outside. Plus Kya and Justin hadn't seen each other all week, and Kellie and I had some private things to talk about. But it sounded like there were people at the park and it went alright.

- We had a hodge podge dinner of different carb choices, different meat choices, and some frozen veggies. I forgot that poor Kya can't have seafood, so she got leftover taco meat, rice, and veggies. Whoops. She just never knows what she'll end up with at our house. Everyone managed to have their bellies filled and the fridge got more emptied and ready for a bigger grocery run.

- Both tax refunds have now hit the bank. The smaller state one is now absorbed into the regular monies, which is fine. The bigger IRS one has now been transferred into a totally separate savings account awaiting a discussion at a much later time. It's not getting wasted like it did last year. Ok, last year, it wasn't wasted, but I'm putting my foot down this year. No touchies. It's for house repairs only. End of story. I'm over it. Hire someone and get it done. I deserve it just as much as whoever bought the house that the men flipped. Hire it done. And move on. 5 yrs is way too long to live with a light fixture dangling in your main bathroom and iron rust stains on your shower wall. Enough is enough. We can't physically do it. Hire a friend that will get it done in a timely manner i.e. it's their primary job, not a weekend job. 

- Anyway, I'm a little less sore than yesterday, but the back of my thighs and knees, and shins still hurt and no amount of stretching is going to take it away. And the edge of my peck muscles going into my armpits are sore, and then along my spine in the upper back. I have chiro and massage appts next week, so that will help a lot.

It was a day for ADHD posts on Instagram! Dr. Hallowell was one of them, top expert in the field, who also has ADHD himself.

That's me ALL THE TIME! I'll sign up for something because it sounds good at the time and then I'll back out because I'm not in the mood or I don't feel good or I'm exhausted or social anxiety. A lot of the time, I'll talk myself into still going of course, because I don't want to disappoint people. I don't want to be rude. But I'm very, very careful not to over promise anymore because I have to back out last minute more often than I want to. But there were also other slides in this particular post that I liked, too.

This song dropped on all platforms today!! It's phenomenal! Like one of the best orchestral pieces Michael W. Smith has ever done! He has help, but if you listen to the piano version, that's all him with his melodies. I do hear hints of some of his other instrumental songs in there, but there's just so much unique Eastern European music sound to it that melts the two together just perfectly! Whenever there's a crisis, Michael W. Smith expresses himself through song. I know there's other connections, but the two main ones that come to my mind is "This is Your Time," about Cassie Bernall from the Columbine school schooling, in Columbine, Colorado in the 1990's and then "There She Stands" after 9/11. I know that one he wrote like within two days after 9/11. So it's how he rolls. Also, he was on a short world tour a few years ago and he was in Ukraine for one of the stops, so they are close to his heart. This piece reflects that. I'm sure he'll be playing this piece at all of his upcoming concerts this year. It's simply gorgeous and blew me away. And of course, this reminds me of why Tyler, his middle child, doesn't fall far from the tree. He's the one that writes mostly movie scores for a living. So much talent in those men's fingers and minds.

Cry for Hope Full Version

Cry For Hope Piano and Violin Solo Version 

Ain't that the truth! And same goes for when we go to bed. Or at anytime when we are stopped for just a moment. A million thoughts in one moment. It's exhausting. Try to keep up with us, I dare you. I'm sure you can't. We can't keep with ourselves. We have too many interests to just pick one. Sometimes the invention of the internet is really, really bad for us because we can use goggle all night long. The rabbit trails go on forever. It's fun, but we don't know how to stop. We binge on everything. Energizer bunnies, if not physically, but with our minds. Women might not have the physical traits that men do with the fidgeting, but it's subtle. And they might be hyperactive, but like me, they have the inattentive side because so many things grab for their attention at once and we let those things do that because it's all interesting and we think everything needs out attention. It's hard telling 9 things to wait so we can focus on the 1 thing right now. But boy, when we can hyperfocus on the 1 thing, we strike so much gold, it's so beautiful. And I love it. ADHD can rock sometimes, too. We are creative, innovative, and ready for anything. We are problem solvers. You need us and we need you. #ADHDforlife

Somebody had my camera again. Grogu, was that you?

Again, so true of the Enneagram 6! Which is me!

Life skill shop lessons happening right now! Putting a new tired on a vehicle. And go! Vroom! It's great having men and sons in your life. You never have to worry about these things! I mean, I could probably do it. I have enough confidence to try. But I don't want to try. Let them handle it. Even in the 45 degree weather. Have fun!

Saturday - Kiss and Make Up

- We had a great Saturday. Jared made gluten free blueberry pancakes for me and blueberry pancakes for the kids. After that, I took a shower, finally. It's been a busy week, so it had been a few days. We had a light lunch of bacon, and then got everyone in the van for a big shopping trip at Aldis.

- Well, big isn't the half of it. The cart was full, but not unusually full. The bill, however, was the highest bill we've EVER had! And we shopped liked we always shopped. A few fun foods here and there. All the regular stuff, which included 4 main meats, all of Abishai's boxes of crackers and snacks because he was completely out, and lots of staples because we were out of everything, and I mean everything. We got just a couple of non grocery items from the Aldis Aisle of Shame, but even that is pretty typical of us. I didn't buy laundry detergent or paper products. But the grand total was $435!! Can you say hyperinflation?! Yes, that's exactly what it is. Everything is up at least $1 or more like $2. And I mean EVERYTHING. 135 items, the receipt says, so if everything is $1 more, that's $135 more. Yup, that makes perfect sense. I think we were hitting the $300 mark a year ago. And we were hitting $250 just before the pandemic. Yes, it's THAT bad. And after checking my Quicken files, yes, we were maintaining the $300 every 10 days/2 weeks all through 2020 and even 2021. And that was with an overflowing there's absolutely no way another thing can fit on it cart. And now $400 barely fills the cart?! Tell me again how Democrats save us from recessions? Oh yeah, they print money and cause hyper inflation! And then cause my husband's raises to mean absolutely nothing and put us on the poor list again. That's how. Oh it makes me so mad! Free money isn't actually free. Sigh.

- But, we got food, and that's what matters. By the time we got home and I put it all away, it was time for screen time. So, the kids did that and Jared and went out on a "date." We stopped at McDonald's for tea and coffee and then Jared drove me out to a house that they put a bid on to flip. They will look at it on Monday to see if they want to seal the deal or not. And then we just went out driving a bit more in the countryside so we could talk and debrief more about our appointment on Thursday. So we killed two birds with one stone. Mission accomplished. We understood the assignment this week. Makes me super happy. And that's all it took to go on a date, too. $6 and whatever in gas. Not terribly difficult. 

- Next weekend, I have a Purple for Parents event and then we'll have a birthday celebration for Socks on Saturday, so I have to pack the kids for their trip on Friday. Because they will sleepover Grandparents house on Saturday and leave really early on Sunday for New Orleans! Fun times! And then we'll have a week to ourselves. Well, we'll have Justin and Benaiah. Maybe we'll take them out to eat on Sunday, that would be fun. We can do a date while Justin has youth group. And then we'll be home alone while Justin is at work. Then Jared wants to take Justin somewhere on Wednesday. Kids get back really late on Good Friday. Then we got to church on Easter Saturday, and they serve on Easter Sunday. But this next week, we have mulch arriving on Monday morning, so we'll try to put that down before the kids leave, even if it's a little bit at time. But then I have appointments on Monday, Tuesday, Thursday and our usual park day on Friday. It will quite interesting who ends up where when. I just hope we manage our mischief well. Just have to pull off some schoolwork this week in order to count the days. We'll say!

 

The e2 Ladies' page used this graphic and I liked it a lot since Michael W. Smith has this song on one of this worship albums. It totally makes sense.

This grocery bill, however, does NOT makes since. The amount of food we purchased, would have cost us about $250 just about a year ago. Hyper inflation IS a thing and it isn't pretty.

Daddy was a victim of Abishai's competitive nature tonight with the ABC go fish game. They tied!

Do NOT let this kid sneak off with your phone! Or you are going to get a bunch of selfies on it! Abishai begged Daddy to not delete this series off of his phone. I insisted that he send me the photos before he deleted them off at the very least. And the funny thing is, Abishai will take photos and then hit the "like" heart button on the photo so they are saved to our "favorites" album! Goofy kid!

Good night, kid!

Sunday - Good Intentions

- Well, head colds are never fun. I was going to try and get out today but didn't. My nose is runny, I'm achy, and my throat hurts. So I only made it over to Leah's house for "Olive Garden" lunch and then drove Justin out to youth group at NPBC. Otherwise, I stayed home for church and took a nap this afternoon. I did manage to brush the dog and clip his nails. But, I made his toenails bleed profusely for a really long time. I had to sit with him for awhile and eventually just sent him outside. Poor thing. But now we don't hear the "click clack" noise so it's better for all of us. I actually had to listen to Dan's sermon twice because I wasn't listening well the first time. Whoops. It was a classic one on the pray of Gethsemane. The sermon from New Pal ended up being the pastor's opinion on Revelation and Daniel and end times. It would have been better taught in a class rather than a Sunday morning. Jared would not have tolerated it. I eventually tuned it out because I didn't have enough brain power for that discussion. I'm actually glad I didn't physically go this morning. I think I might start going after Easter now. We'll see. I have the blessing I was seeking now. It's up to me now to act on it.

- Jared talked about what do with the house if he flips several more houses and makes a master suite above the sunroom. Well, yes, that would be nice. However, not sure if I could up the stairs. I just wanted to bump out our bedroom and have a walk in closet. But, whatever. I'll take the dreaming for now. It's good creative exercise. He went with Jim to see the property that they put a bid on and Jim said he could visualize what they needed to do, so that's excellent. Time to take a deep breathe, sign the contract, and make it work and quickly. Lots of trust again. But that's all I can do there.

- I was still surprised Justin went to the Rock youth group at New Palestine Bible Church because I shared that graphic with him about what they were doing at Crave (wear your favorite sports jersey, eat hot dogs, pack snacks for the elementary school for the snack collection we did) and he almost said he wanted to switch but then I remembered he had promised Kya he was going to NPBC so he couldn't switch on her. And it looks like he had a great time. Just as long as we get that kid some more driving hours so he can do the drive himself to New Pal after he gets his license. But he's only written down about 3 1/2 hrs worth of night driving and 6 hrs of day driving hrs. Say what?! Surely he's driving more at night and just not written it down. Benaiah had to fudge on his record and I didn't want to do that with Justin. But really, how hard is it to get 50 hrs in 6 months?! Ugh! I did the first run to get him to youth group, but Jared did the other 3 runs including picking up Justin and dropping Keturah to do her thing with small group. Oh, speaking off, Ron did notice Justin was missing from Crave youth group this evening. 

- So, it was a little awkward at the end of the day, but we managed to handle that ok. I made myself do a few chores, too, so tomorrow will run more sooner. Now I'm exhausted and just want to go to sleep. I'll post pics and vids tomorrow.

Benaiah played drums today.  I don't mind listening to Indian Creek's service online because I can control the volume. Yes, I've become that church member. I reduce my headaches that way. I feel like I worship better at home because I'm thinking about everything else around me. It's an ADHD thing. I sing worship songs all day long anyway. Corporate worship just doesn't hold much meaning to me and I'm still struggling with it. If Benaiah lived somewhere else, like at college, I could potential be livestreaming him playing drums there, so I'm ok with this arrangement.

Benaiah drumming 4/3/2022

Exactly.

I'm also experimenting with comparing and contrasting Indian Creek with New Pal Bible Church. From the performance based worship style with lights, dark room, professionalism, perfect broadcast, etc. to the what you see below, rough, still figuring things out in their new building, small, more like the church of my youth or like the Cornwall church with 120 people or so. Which feels more relatable? I have decided to attend New Pal until after Easter because after one of the sermons, I wanted to get more of a feel for the sermons first just be sure. Now that I have permission to go, I'm almost afraid to make that step as well. And physically getting there takes effort and a different mindset every Sunday morning. Once I start, I have to continue or people will start to ask. I have to be socially and mentally ready for that bombardment. I can do this. Sigh. Soon.

New Palestine Bible Church reminds me of Manchester Christian Church or really Cornwall Christian Church because of it's size and level of music skills and tech skills. I'd almost rather worship this way because it's on my level of ability as a pianist and I guess I just imagine people being more done to earth, living a slower life, knowing each other better because there's less better to know, you can tell when someone is missing, you can tell when someone is new, no one is rushing around. Plus, the songs are actually a few years older and I like these songs. I don't always like the new songs that Indian Creek does which are technically old according to the worship movement. There's nothing wrong with them. But we really don't have to introduce new songs every week. Benaiah thinks we should. They think we should. No we don't. Simplicity is what I like. Save the professionalism for concerts. So, we'll see how the sermons are and try to attend after Easter.

I was looking at how the kids still have the latch hook rugs my dad made for them in their rooms. Keturah wants a new rug, and I don't blame her, but she also doesn't loathe this one. I mean it's pink, sure. But she doesn't make comments about it. I think it's because she knows where it comes from. I'm definitely ok with her putting it away at anytime. It's a bit worn and well loved. I'm grateful that my kids have appreciated the things that my parents have made and once they were aware of it, tried to take care of them. And I appreciate that my kids don't care about the latest trends and name brands and fashions. Keturah does want a blue rug that matches her room better and covers more of her floor space. it's $35 or a little more and she has to earn it. Mowing season is coming up soon, and that's why I'm not going to split the money with her this time. This is the last of the pink, though. Once this is put away, no more pink fabric things in the room. She's got Legos and some doll things. But this is it.

This one looks a little better because it has had less traffic on it. Again, my dad made it. It's surprising out tough latchhook rugs are! There's no other backing on these either. But they stay in place fairly well. And Justin doesn't care that it's babyish with it's numbers on it. I mean, he's the one still sleeping with his Cars movie pillow case and blanket and he's 16 1/2 yrs old so, whatever kid. If his small group friends could only see the things he actually likes, I think they would be shocked and even might mock him. But who knows. Sometimes I think he doesn't want to grow up as fast as Benaiah did. He's taking the slow lane like the turtles in Finding Nemo just riding the current.

Abishai brought out all his wide eyed friends today. He always bring out some kind of stuffy friend to carry around with him. He doesn't like being alone.

One of the stuffy's had a birthday written on its' tag, so he wrote it out on the chalk board.

The Camp Allendale guy came to our church and spoke to the kids about signing up for camp today. He actually scanned the whole crowd and found Abishai who happened to be wearing his Camp Allendale shirt today! And the guy pulled him up on stage! Aw, what a special privilege! They also handed out stickers and Abishai couldn't wait to come home and put it on his water bottle like the big kids do.

We've had a lot of windy storms lately and the bat box finally got loose enough and fell down. We don't think it every did attract any bats. So, Jared said he will take it apart and burn it or whatever. Oh well. It was worth a try. He doesn't know what he's going to do with the big pole but we'll see! Oooooo, maybe we can use it as a tetherball pole!

Melinda talking about Socks' Fluff

I finally got around to brushing the dog after 2 or 3 weeks. This was mainly from his front half I believe. There were actually some darker fluff in there. It's just so fluffy! I can't imagine how hot it is to wear this everyday. This is all because of the Great Pyrenees in him. They need it for the mountains. But it's super soft and feels a bit like wool because it has the oils in it like the sheep's lanolin. It's not matted or anything and there's no burrs or sticks. It's just fluffy down. It just grows and grows like a sheep's wool does.

Aww, pitiful dog. I trimmed his nails, too. And I thought I only barely nicked 2 nails but I actually nicked 5 nails and several were pretty bad. I eventually had to let him outside to finish getting them to stop bleeding because I couldn't sit any longer. I am supposed to do this monthly so I can the qwick to go back but I don't. At least now all I hear is his toe pads and not click clack nails. I can't stand the click clacking.

Poor baby doggy's nails wont' stop bleeding.

While I think this is true, and I think we parents can put a lot of pressure on them, I also think society is to blame for a ton of it, as well as peers. But let's not just weep. What can we do about it? Well, one of my first answers of course is to pray, and then to change their environment. Protect them. Screen their friends. Work on your marriage so they don't have to worry about that. And homeschool. Pull them out of that hell hole of a school. There's way too much pressure there to perform in so many different ways. I thought high school looked volatile in the 90's. That's sooooo tame compared to today. So tame. There's a reason why homeschooled kids don't have as many mental health issues. Or that their mental health issues improved when just weeks and months of coming home from public school. Think about it. And kids are just plain confused when there's so many agendas beyond basic academics being shoved down their throats all the time with CRT, SEL, CSE. If you're not LGBTQ or whateve, than you're not cool. If you haven't had sex with someone, than you're abnormal. It's up to us to provide less stress. The world won't give it to them. We can make the difference. We can be the ones to help them through the right academic program and into college or apprenticeships. I weep, too, because parents don't get it. You've sent your kids to a place of indoctrination for 13 yrs of their life and you've expected them to be ok or to come out just like you did. Well, I'm sorry, school isn't like what it was when you went. You are seeing the results of your actions. I'm sorry. I weep with you and for you and for your children. I really do. We can do better for those coming behind us. This is your wake up call.

The End