Year 2, Day 96: Emotional Highs and Lows

Hm,...there's lots to talk about, but I can't share it all either.  So, what do I say?  We did get to see the house today that we put an offer on.  I took my big camera and took a lot of pictures of the details that Jared would want to see, or things I would want to plan for, what to prioritize etc.  You see, this house is huge!  The price per square foot is incredible.  Why? Well, there's a ton of little maintainance projects, plus some bigger ones that need to be done.  Some before someone moves and lots over the next few years.  Thankfully, we do have some vision already.  Our financial situation will make it hard to bring everything to fruition, and our schedules.  But we are looking at this house for the long term and that improvements will be made over the years.  So, while it was great to be in the house today and show it to Leah, Benaiah, and Justin, and figure out some great things I hadn't seen before, I did notice some other cosmetic details that kind of bummed me out.

You see, I keep forgetting that I have a very capable husband and family and lots of friends that can come and help me make any house a home.  I simply do not have the strength and stamina to clean or do repairs or do yardwork.  Those things are not my gifts anyway.  I have to remind myself to stay humble and ask for help and let go of control.  As I posted on Facebook today, I've already talking with the kids about doing some of the monthly type chores (like cleaning the inside of the fridge) for a small amount of money, all the while they will be doing regular daily chores.  Oh my goodness, I just remembered a part of Psalm 139 where it says that the woman of the home delegates tasks to her servants.  It IS ok for me to be the administrator and gentle task masker, teaching my children how to take care of a home, all the while freeing me up to rest and focus on other things.  I think I actually said that a year ago when we moved into this condo.  I have taught them a few things, like they can wipe down a bathroom now.  They will need to learn how to wash dishes because this house doesn't have a dishwasher and we have to focus on buying a stove and washer (we'll put up a clothesline to dry our clothes).  So, my thoughts have been swirling around these things and reminding myself to trust in my family and friends.  Just because I'm physically not able to do much, doesn't make me any less of a homemaker.  I can still set goals and visions with Jared as to where we want to take our family as we really settle down again.

Meanwhile, I, and everyone, will need extra prayers because moving stresses me out.  I just want to focus on homeschooling and book learning, but life won't allow for that right now.  I have to be content with what we have learned already this year and that God will fill in any gaps.  It's time to transition but transitions freak me out.  It takes a lot of energy to orchestra it all and emotionally deal with it on a personal level.  Pray that our offer is excepted and the rest of the process goes quickly and smoothly.  We do keep our eyes open for other homes, but we really feel that this is the one.  Keturah is praying hard that we get this house and asks constantly about it.  Benaiah was not impressed with all the repairs and the distance from the church.  Abishai went into the house and immediately turned right and went straight for what will be the playroom which overlooks the creek, so I think he's calling it home.  Justin is neutral and listening too much to big brother's comments.  He just wants his own room.  And Socks?  Well, we've got space for him!  And a plan to make him comfortable and tend to his needs.  Socks turns 7 years old in a few days!  He's going to be a senior doggie!  And we saw some other dogs at the neighbors today, so it will be very interesting how we all get along.

I'm sorry this post has been all about the house.  It's an incredibly big deal this time.  We are more mature and thinking much more deeply on this purchase than we did for our first house, which ironically has been listed for sale!  And some of it has changed, and no, I wouldn't want to go back there.  We did do some schoolwork, hung out, I did taxes, Abishai napped, etc etc.  normal day that way.  Jared got home safe and sound from his overnight trip and spent the evening playing with the kids and reading his book.  I spent the evening catching up on emails and making sure to respond quickly to the new Homeschool Parents of the Creek Facebook page that a new friend and I created yesterday!  The page exploded already which is great sign that it was NEEDED.  That makes me feel great, that something I feel passionate about and a dream I've had is coming true!  So, if you are part of the Creek, and are homeschooling, feel free to ask to join our support group!  Thankfully, I have a partner in this endeavor, so I'll let her run the show bit by bit and I'll encourage from behind the screen.

The pieces are falling into place, and I know God's hands are in it all.  I just have to breathe and let everything be.  Sit back and watch how God works.  He will orchestrate if we get this house or not.  He'll provide the appliances and funds to fix what we need fixed right away.  He's given Jared enough experience to take care of these things now, and children that can help, too.  I need to type these things out so that I remember them and speak God's promises so I believe them.  I can get so wound up and have to work at stepping away and trusting in God.

Ok, just a couple of random things I don't want to forget.  Abishai has now switched from "go-go" for "dog" to "doggie."  Sad face :(  He picked out his own outfit today, but couldn't decide on which shirt to wear, so I let wear both.  He's also wearing his winter boots over his newer shoes, maybe because Keturah and I have been wearing boots the past couple of days?   And, get this: the signature that Benaiah got at the hockey game this week was from a player with the last name of Vance.  He is a Canadian and played for our very own Prince Edward Island Islanders' hockey team!  That's right!  I don't know if Benaiah actually said something about it to him, but how cool is that?  A connection from 1600 miles away!  Benaiah said he would love to get season tickets, but they do cost a ton more than they did for the Islanders.  I think Benaiah has very fond memories of going to the games with our friend Bob, getting a hot chocolate and dougnut for Tim's and just being "with the guys."  Benaiah may love being here in Indiana with his grandparents and his friends, but I think a part of him, like all of us, was left there on the Island.  It'll forever be great memories of his childhood he can look upon someday.

And that is all.

Library time with Big Brother and Little Brother.  Yes, Benaiah is playing with the wire and bead toy!

This boy is never without a minecraft or pokemon book . Just wish he had his Bible Bowl book with him, too.

Meanwhile, Justin did accomplish memorizing all the verses for Bible Bowl this year!  Yes, he's memorized ALL OF THESE!

AND THESE!

I finally downloaded the pictures of the baby dedication that the photographer took.  Here's a picture of people settling in before the ceremony.

Nice smiles Seth and Gary!

Receiving our certificate of promising to raise Abishai in a Christian home and share the Gospel with him.

Praying over Mr. Wiggly Man.

Well, we tried to get a nice photo of the 3 of us.  Abishai wasn't very cooperative.

Abishai looking out to the creek from the potential play room / sun room.

Of course the teenager is tired and needs to lay down and play on his iPod in the middle of a house tour.  Of course.  And yes, that's a beautiful wood stove behind him.

We can see railroad tracks from the house's yard!  It will be harder to see them once the leaves come back, but still.  There's the train tracks!

Big brother helping little brother with his train game.

What a contrast!  Little guy and big guy!

They are all watching Thomas the Tank Engine.

Abishai was delaying going down for a nap by wanting to read books with baba.  I had to scoop him up and put to bed crying.  I had waited too long and it was past naptime.

Jared brought home a neat illustration of what happens when we sin.  When we sin, the water turns red/bloody (it was kool aid).  But then Jesus, the bleach, erases our sin and .....well, we didn't see the actual results so I think it was supposed to neutralize the color or something.  Point is, Jesus' blood washes away our sin.  Fascinating!